IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, international tourism creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern life. Some
people
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 believe that no one
know
Correct subject-verb agreement
knows
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 international
tourism
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 is the biggest part of
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
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 in the world.
while
Linking Words
 others argue international
tourism
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 creates bad
things
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 between
peeple
Correct your spelling
people
 from different cultures. In my
opinion
Punctuation problem
opinion,
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 that i will examine both ways in
this
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 essay.
on
Fix capitalization
On
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 the one hand,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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international
tourism
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 is quite important to every country
which
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, which
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represent
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represents
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 about
themselves
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itself
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 and
raise
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raises
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 communities to vulume money
into
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for
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 the country.
Although
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 many
people
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is
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apply
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mean
t
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apply
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that
big
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a big
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 population come
through
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through,
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join
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joining
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 with
also
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 have
differents
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different
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 countries
,
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apply
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 different cultures so it so easy to misunderstand each
others
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other
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.
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moreover
Fix capitalization
Moreover
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, some
reaction
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reactions
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 may
effect
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affect
show examples
to
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apply
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racist
people
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, sometimes
has
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have
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big
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big,
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 serious
things
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 until have
accident
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accidents
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 or
someone dies
Verb problem
the deaths of others
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.
in
Change preposition
On
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 the
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other
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 hand, it is acceptable that international
tourism
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 should be
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoided
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 to
creates
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create
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 tension.
However
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, its advantages more
than
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the
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 disadvantages because the exchange can be more
valueable
Correct your spelling
valuable
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such
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, such
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 as learning new
langauges
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languages
,
how
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knowing how
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 to
know
Verb problem
apply
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use new technologies,
new
Verb problem
making new
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freinds
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friends
,
new
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meeting new
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people
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, and
new
Verb problem
experiencing new
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things
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 that never met in your
countries
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country
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. It can improve
Correct article usage
the country
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country
Check wording
country's
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 business. Conclusion,
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 think the different
culters
Correct your spelling
cultures
 it really weird
in
Change preposition
at
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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first
time
Check wording
apply
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, but
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
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 shows how to
extent
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expand
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 your mind
in
Change preposition
to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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different
things
Use synonyms
andbalance
Correct your spelling
and balance
 the good
things
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also
Punctuation problem
, also
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 limit
bad
Correct article usage
the bad
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things
Use synonyms
 that can
happened
Wrong verb form
happen
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 in the future.

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structure
Plan your essay in a simple outline before you write. Say your view in the first paragraph and keep one idea in each paragraph.
coherence
Use small linking words to show how ideas fit together. Words like first, next, also, but, however help a lot.
content
Give one clear point to back each idea. If you can, give a short example from real life to show what you mean.
language
Check your spelling and grammar. Use short, clear sentences to avoid errors.
idea
The essay shows an attempt to discuss both sides.
organization
There is a basic essay shape with intro, body, and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • cultural exchange
  • misunderstandings
  • stereotypes
  • disrespectful
  • inappropriate
  • fostering understanding
  • appreciation
  • direct interactions
  • shared experiences
  • personal connections
  • promoting peace
  • global understanding
  • exposing individuals
  • preconceived notions
  • biases
  • cultural sensitivity training
  • community-driven tourism initiatives
  • responsible tourism
  • sustainable tourism practices
What to do next:
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