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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that teaching children at home is the best for a children's development while others think it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both advantages of each method and give your own opinion.

While
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 many people prefer teaching
children
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 at
home
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due to
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 its merits, others argue that formal education is important for
children
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.
This
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 essay will discuss
this
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 issue from both perspectives
and
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, and
show examples
then
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 I will express my own view. On the one hand, homeschooling offers many benefits for
kids
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.
Firstly
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, it provides studying time flexibility, enabling parents to make a schedule that depends on their
kids
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' abilities and needs.
Also
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, learning at
home
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 gives
children
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 a calm environment, where
kids
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 can be more productive.
In addition
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,
this
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 learning
way
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method
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 motivates innovation by providing a designated path appropriate for each student.
For instance
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, a study in Japan showed that teaching
children
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 at
home
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 reflects positively
in
Change preposition
on
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 many aspects of
children
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's lives ,
such
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 as confidence and self-esteem.
On the other hand
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, opponents show that traditional learning is more appropriate for students these days
due to
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 many reasons. Studying at schools is responsible for helping
children
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 gain many life
skills
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 which not provided by other studying methods.
Furthermore
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, teamwork
skills
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 are one of the most significant
skills
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where
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that
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 students can engage in
it
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apply
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starting at school. Communication
skills
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, good listening, empathy, and peer learning are significant for future labour marketing; schools are the first source of teaching these
skills
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 by practising them. In conclusion,
while
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 some people think that teaching at
home
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 provides beneficial points for
kids
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. Others tend to believe that school is the appropriate place to absorb knowledge.
However
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, the two views have their merits. Ultimately, from my own perspective as a mom, I tend to believe that learning at school offers more merits for
children
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, their personality, and their future.

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content
Add clear, main points for each view with a short example for each.
coherence
Work on links between ideas to keep the flow. Use simple connect words like 'also', 'but', 'however'.
grammar
Check grammar and spelling. Fix errors like 'labour' and awkward phrases.
structure
Make the conclusion strong: restate your view and sum up the reasons.
content
Clear view and structure with an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence
Good use of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to show two sides.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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