IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past 30 years that may cities in the world are now "one big traffic jam" How true do you think this statement is? What measurement can government take to avoid this.

In
recent
Correct article usage
the recent
show examples
 30
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
 there
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
 a fast-changing tendency in cities:
big
Correct word choice
a large
show examples
 amount of
car
Use synonyms
ownerships
Fix the agreement mistake
ownership
show examples
turning
Punctuation problem
, turning
show examples
 the planet into a place with
infinte
Correct your spelling
infinite
 traffic jams. These changes are a big issue that needs to be considered not only by
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
, but by ordinary people too. Personally,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 agree with
this
Linking Words
 quote, because it is not that hard to see
this
Linking Words
 problem by myself on
everyday
Correct article usage
an everyday
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 basis. In
retrospective
Replace the word
retrospect
show examples
,
vehicular
Correct article usage
the vehicular
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 industry started to develop only a few centuries ago.
Mostly
Use the right word
Most
show examples
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
of them were used in plants and factories, and the impact on cities and the environment was not that deep. After different inventions in
car
Use synonyms
conctruction
Correct your spelling
construction
, ordinary people got
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 possibility to be mobile across the country without any physical pressure, which was a big revolution in easing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people`s
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 type of mobility is very comfortable and luxurious, it seems like nobody really sees how it is
disasterous
Correct your spelling
disastrous
 for humanity. Driving a
car
Use synonyms
 leads to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
harmful emissions of gas, carbon dioxide, reduces the level of physical activity of drivers and creates big traffic jams in
megapolises
Check wording
megacities
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. Traffic jams are
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 problem for pedestrians and ordinary people because of
Correct article usage
the inablity
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inablity
Correct your spelling
inability
 to move across the city freely during the rush hour. Governments of big cities
such
Linking Words
 as New York, London, Tokyo are working on
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different programs, easing routes, rules for drivers, which
includes
Correct subject-verb agreement
include
show examples
 driving on
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different days in a week or using different routes to and from work.
Although
Linking Words
 these initiatives may be useful and beneficial,
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 impact fades in
comparance
Correct your spelling
comparison
 with
increasing
Replace the word
the increase
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
car
Use synonyms
ownerships
Fix the agreement mistake
ownership
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 problem needs to be solved by every government together, in the same systems
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 that
impact
Correct article usage
the impact
show examples
 of
car
Use synonyms
drivings
Fix the agreement mistake
driving
show examples
 wouldn`t be
such
Linking Words
disasterous
Correct your spelling
disastrous
.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 would like to say that vehicles
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a part of huge environmental issues to be solved in future. Everyone on
this
Linking Words
 planet should take responsibility to save our planet
instaed
Correct your spelling
instead
 of thinking about their own comfort.

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language
Fix the grammar and spelling. Use clear forms like 'cars cause' not 'car drivings' and 'las' not needed.
structure
Plan your essay. Use an intro, then your 2-3 main ideas, then a short conclusion.
content
Give more solid ideas. Add numbers or facts, and a clear plan to cut use of cars.
style
Use short sentences. Break long lines to help read.
content
The main idea is clear: cars hurt city life.
content
You give example of big cities.
voice
You try to speak for the city and people.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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