IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory part of the high school curriculum ( for example, working for charity, improving the neighbourhood, or teaching sports to younger children ) To what extent do you agree or disagree

In the high school curriculum, volunteer group services need to be mandatory, to enhance the neighbourhood, or teach teenagers learning sport activities.
While
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 some oppose
this
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 notion, I personally argue in favour as unpaid
community
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 services can help
students
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 to learn new skills and
also
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 the
community
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 at the same time.
Firstly
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, doing
community
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service
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 is good for
students
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' character. When they help other people, they become more mature.
For instance
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, if
students
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work
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 in the garden or help adults, they learn how to be responsible.
Secondly
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, not only do the student can
students
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 get benefits from unpaid
community
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service
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 , but
also
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 the
community
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.
For example
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, some charities do not have enough income to pay workers. If
students
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 help for free,
as a result
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, these organisations can do more
work
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 and save money.
However
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, high school
students
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 are already busy with their homework. If they
work
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volunteer
Change preposition
on volunteer
show examples
community
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service
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Punctuation problem
,
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 will make
students
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 stressed. What many
students
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 look for is that they can get stressed and tired when they do not manage
thier
Correct your spelling
their
work
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 , and it can exert on their mental health. In conclusion, unpaid
community
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service
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 is great. It helps
students
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 grow and makes the
community
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 stronger.
Also
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, they learn how to be mature.

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structure
Plan your essay first. Start with your view, then give one or two main ideas, then end with a short finish.
grammar
Fix grammar and spelling. Watch for wrong word form and odd phrases like 'the student can students'.
cohesion
Use linking words to tie ideas well. Use easy words like and, also, but, for example.
content
Give one or two clear examples for each point. Keep ideas simple and real.
grammar
Check your spell and keep sentences short. This helps reading and avoid mistakes.
stance
Your view is clear and you say you are for the idea.
examples
You use real ideas like garden work and charity to show points.
balance
You note a possible downside of busy work and stress.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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