IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where revelant

The
pie
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charts
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 compare
water
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 usage across the world
different
Change preposition
for different
show examples
purposes
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 in North and South
America
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,
Europe
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, Africa, Central
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, North
America
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 and
Europe
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 have the highest
proportion
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 of
water
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 used for industrial
purposes
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,
while
Linking Words
 the remaining regions
use
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water
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 for agriculture. First of all, the highest percentage of
water
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used
Verb problem
is used
show examples
 for agricultural
purposes
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 in Central
Asia
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, at 88% from the
pie
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 chart. The
second highest
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second-highest
show examples
proportion
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 of
water
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used
Verb problem
is used
show examples
 in Africa at 84%.
According to
Linking Words
pie
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charts
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, the percentage of
water
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 used for agricultural
purposes
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 remains the highest figures in South East
Asia
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 and South
America
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 at 81% and
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
71% respectively.
By contrast
Linking Words
, agricultural
used
Replace the word
use
show examples
 and domestic used that agricultural
use
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 always
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the highest percentage on the
pie
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charts
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. The lowest percentages of
water
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 used for domestic
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
in
Verb problem
are in
show examples
 Central
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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at
Punctuation problem
, at
show examples
 7% respectively
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
show examples
 the highest
proportion
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 of 19% in South
America
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.
According to
Linking Words
pie
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charts
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,
water
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 used for industrial
purposes
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 has the highest
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 in
Europe
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 and North
America
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,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest figure is domestic
use
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 among all the
pie
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charts
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. The figure for industrial
use
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 in
Europe
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 by 53% and the second highest
proportion
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 of 48% in North
America
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words pie, charts, water, purposes, america, europe, asia, proportion, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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