An increasing number of children are overweight which could result in many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

There has been much discussion revolving around the issue of an increasing number of overweight

chlidren

Correct your spelling

children

and how it can affect their health and health care costs.

This

Linking Words

essay will highlight the reasons and possible solutions to overcome

this

Linking Words

issue. Some people assert that overconsumption of

high fat

Use the right word

high-fat

show examples

foods is the main reason for a huge number of obese children. Kids these days don’t feel guilty

nor

Punctuation problem

, nor

show examples

do they fear their parents when it comes to overdosing

fast

Change preposition

on fast

show examples

Check wording

food or

show examples

unhealthy meals. Adults usually do not pay attention to

this

Linking Words

as long as their child is calm and satisfied.

Consequently

Linking Words

, diseases

such

Linking Words

as obesity and diabetes start to appear and evolve. It becomes harder for a youngster to stay involved in

every day

Use the right word

everyday

show examples

activities, keep in touch with their friends, but more

importantly

Punctuation problem

importantly,

show examples

it could result in high expenses on the treatment of the illness. Not all hospitals have the environment to treat serious forms of these conditions, so the demand for private

hospitals

Fix the agreement mistake

hospital

show examples

facilities increases. In

order

Use synonyms

to solve

this

Linking Words

problem, sugar taxes could be imposed

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

could assist in decreasing the use of unhealthy products

such

Linking Words

as candies, cookies and sugary drinks. The second factor we need to take into consideration is

sedentary

Correct article usage

a sedentary

show examples

lifestyle

due to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

excessive use of technologies and electronic devices.

Nowadays

Punctuation problem

Nowadays,

show examples

these gadgets are more inevitable than ever

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

children do not feel the limits or the outcomes of too much screen time

Punctuation problem

show examples

this

Linking Words

is not properly

controlled

Punctuation problem

controlled,

show examples

it leads to addiction

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

and a lack of physical activity. Infants choose to play video games or

Verb problem

apply

show examples

watch an online TV show rather than going outside or spending some quality time with their friends and family. It might lead to overweight or psychol In

order

Use synonyms

to solve

this

Linking Words

problem, certain measures need to be implemented.

Firstly

Linking Words

, increasing the number of PE classes in schools and

kintergardens

Correct your spelling

kindergartens

this

Linking Words

way physical activity would be mandatory.

Secondly

Linking Words

, more

free of charge

Use the right word

free-of-charge

show examples

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

clubs or spaces could offer their services.

Lastly

Linking Words

sports related

Use the right word

sports-related

show examples

educations

Fix the agreement mistake

education

show examples

could be held in schools in

order

Use synonyms

to enhance the understanding of

importance

Correct article usage

the importance

show examples

athletism

Use the right word

athletics

show examples

. On the basis of the above discussion, I believe that

this

Linking Words

issue is becoming more relevant every day and that it is necessary to find the right solutions and follow them in

order

Use synonyms

to stop

this

Linking Words

overweight

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

wave.

oimigle

Mar 2, 2026

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Task Response

Make the main ideas clear and strong. Start with one good reason, then add more detail and end with a tie to the idea.

Task Response

Add more facts or small examples to back up each point.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use easy links to move from one idea to the next. Use words like first, then, also, finally.

Language

Fix spelling and grammar. Use short, simple sentences and check your work.

Structure

Clear overall structure with intro, body, and conclusion.

Content

It covers both causes and ways to solve the problem.

Coherence

There are some good linking words and ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

389 words

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An increasing number of children are overweight which could result in many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

'People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugar, which causes Manu health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

In some countries, some people are renting accomodation, while other are buying their own homes. Does renting accomodation have more advantages or more disadvantages than buying a place?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding the changes. Others, however think that changes is always a good thing. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.