IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

There is a tendency that people change their jobs rapidly and frequently than before. What are the reasons Is it a positive or negative development

Nowadays, more and more
people
Use synonyms
 switch jobs more frequently than before. It is widely argued that it is a positive trend for society, and I believe it brings more pros. The main reason many workers choose to change their working environment quickly is to earn higher salaries. In recent years, average spending per person has been increasing year by year, requiring
people
Use synonyms
 to earn sufficient income to cover daily expenses.
Thus
Linking Words
, by changing jobs, one can easily get promoted and receive higher pay.
Moreover
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, many young
people
Use synonyms
 are unwilling to endure a poor working environment, so they tend to switch to another company.
This
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 is mainly because the youth are taught to express themselves from a young age, so they have the courage to speak up for their personal needs. In my opinion, the rapidly changing trend in job positions is
overall
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 beneficial. Admittedly, we cannot deny that
this
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 may increase a company's training costs, thereby lowering a country's economic growth.
However
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,
this
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 can be overcome with a solid standard training process, which shortens the time it takes for an employee to get used to their work content. So, we should not let it limit
people
Use synonyms
’s freedom.
Besides
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,
this
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 trend forces employers to treat their workers better, since they might quit at any time.
This
Linking Words
 encourages bosses to create a more work-friendly environment for everyone, thereby increasing workers' productivity. In conclusion, there are various reasons why
people
Use synonyms
 are changing jobs more rapidly than before, and I reckon it is a positive change for society.

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structure
Plan your answer first. Say your view in the intro. Then give two clear reasons with support. End with a short conclusion that restates your view.
cohesion
Link ideas well. Use simple words to show how ideas fit with each other.
content
Add clearer facts or examples to prove your points.
grammar
Check grammar and form. Simple sentences can be strong when well used.
content
Be careful with general claims. If you say something about groups, make it as a possible view, not a rule.
content
Clear view that job switching can be good for society.
cohesion
Good use of linking words to show flow.
organization
Easy to follow layout: intro, two body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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