IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some student work while studying.This often results in lacking tome for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the cause of this? What solution can yoi suggest?

Many
students
Use synonyms
 have to
work
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 they are studying.
This
Linking Words
 can lead to
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
 their time for education and
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 their feeling
under
Change preposition
of
show examples
 pressure. I believe that
this
Linking Words
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that many
students
Use synonyms
Verb problem
do have
show examples
have not
Correct word order
not have
show examples
 enough
finantial
Correct your spelling
financial
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they are obligated to
work
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 studying, in order to obtain enough money to pay university
duties
Check wording
fees
show examples
 and taxes. Particularly,
students
Use synonyms
 coming from poor regions or poor settings have to pay the same
money
Check wording
amount
show examples
of
Change preposition
as
show examples
 those
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are supported without problems by their own families.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, for some
students
Use synonyms
working
Punctuation problem
, working
show examples
while
Linking Words
 studying
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 is just a choice. They decide to
work
Use synonyms
, in order to be independent and to pay for their extras, like journeys, clothes or their hobbies. In
this
Linking Words
 way, they can waste time dedicated
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their education. Sometimes
students
Use synonyms
 lose courses, exams or
hand practices
Check wording
practice sessions
show examples
 just because they have to
mantain
Correct your spelling
maintain
 their
work
Use synonyms
. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 thought
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 some rules are needed. First of all,
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
 should support poor people and their families, lowering taxes and giving the same opportunities to all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
students
Use synonyms
. In the
meanwhile
Use the right word
meantime
show examples
, sustainable works should be promoted and provided by the same Universities, in order to help
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
wants
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
show examples
 or
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
finantial
Correct your spelling
financial
 support.
Finally
Linking Words
, university programs should be tailored to those
students
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 have to support themselves.

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organization
Improve the essay flow by adding a clear intro that states the topic, and a short conclusion that sums the ideas.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas connect, such as 'also', 'because', 'for example', and clear transitions between points.
grammar
Check grammar and spelling to fix misuses, like 'finantial', 'mantain', and verb forms. Use simple, correct English.
content
Give specific examples to back up points, for instance, names of scholarships or programs that help students with funds.
content
The writer shows awareness that money issues affect study time and pressure.
content
There are clear ideas on causes and on some solutions, such as government aid and university programs.
structure
The essay is logically organized into blocks of ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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