IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that government should spend money on railways. Others believe that there should be more investments into new roads. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In
this
Linking Words
 modern world, some argue that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should focus more on making a good railway system in cities so that community
people
Use synonyms
 can commute
easliy
Correct your spelling
easily
.
However
Linking Words
,
other's
Check wording
others'
show examples
 point of view is to concentrate more on constructing more
roads
Use synonyms
. I believe that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 it's required to make improvements in both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sectors, and the reason for
this
Linking Words
 notion will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. On one side, spending more funds on making better railways is very crucial as in most of the busy cities there is a
lot
Use synonyms
 of traffic on
roads
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 makes it difficult for
people
Use synonyms
 to
travel
Use synonyms
 on
daily
Correct article usage
a daily
show examples
 basis. To elaborate, in most of the
towns
Punctuation problem
towns,
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people
Use synonyms
 prefer to use public transportation to go to their work, and
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 on
roads
Use synonyms
 make
if
Use the right word
it
show examples
 very inconvenient to
travel
Use synonyms
, so
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 important to spend more money on railways or subways.
Moreover
Linking Words
, women feel
more safe
Correct word choice
safer
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 to
travel
Use synonyms
 in subways, because they feel it's
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
safer.
For instance
Linking Words
, a
lot
Use synonyms
 of stations and trains have cameras,
beacause
Correct your spelling
because
 of which women feel more secure to
travel
Use synonyms
 alone.
Thus
Linking Words
, investing more
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
Linking Words
 form of transportation will be
benificiary
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 for a
lot
Use synonyms
 of individuals.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
roads
Use synonyms
 are one of the things used by every generation
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 to
travel
Use synonyms
, so
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 more crucial to spend more money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the construction and timely repair of
roads
Use synonyms
. Apart from that, sidewalks can
also
Linking Words
 be made for
eassy
Correct your spelling
easy
 use of
people
Use synonyms
 who prefer to walk.
For example
Linking Words
, in smaller towns where commercial areas are
less
Add a comma
less,
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 it's not possible to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access
of
Change preposition
to
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 trains, so it's mandatory to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good functional
roads
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, new highways can be planned by community services in order to prevent traffic in market areas, and
people
Use synonyms
 who prefer to use personal vehicles can take
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
 of the facilities. In my
opition
Correct your spelling
opinion
, priority should be given to
Use synonyms
roads
Fix the agreement mistake
road
show examples
betterment
Check wording
improvement
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, as
roads
Use synonyms
 are used by most
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
popullation
Correct your spelling
population
 to do their daily activities , and everyone
deserve
Correct subject-verb agreement
deserves
show examples
 a safe space to
travel
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 railways
saves
Correct subject-verb agreement
save
show examples
 a
lot
Use synonyms
 of time
Use synonyms
travel
Use the right word
travelling
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, as
people
Use synonyms
 don't have to face traffic, and it's
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
safer for women,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
roads
Use synonyms
 are more
used
Rephrase
commonly used
show examples
 by everyone to
travel
Use synonyms
 a distant
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and even the nearer places
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 it needs more focus.

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grammar
Fix many grammar and spelling errors so the meaning is clear.
cohesion
Use simple link words to show how ideas go from one to next, e.g., also, but, in addition, for example.
structure
Make a small plan before you write: intro with your view, 2 body parts for each side, and a short conclusion that restates your view.
content
Give more clear and full details or examples for each idea you give.
vocabulary
Check word choice and spell common words correctly.
task
The essay shows a clear view and tries to cover both sides.
content
Some good examples are used to show the idea of rail time and safety.
structure
There is a plan in place with an intro and a conclusion.
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