IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that bicycles are the best mode of transport in the cities, while others disagree. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both views and give your opinion.

Bicycles are considered a very good
mode
Use synonyms
 of transport in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
urban areas.
Although
Linking Words
 some
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
disagree with the notion.
This
Linking Words
 essay will elucidate the
prons
Use the right word
pros
show examples
 and cons in subsequent paragraphs. In my opinion, the benefits
such
Linking Words
 as no fuel
usuage
Correct your spelling
usage
 and exercise
overweigh
Verb problem
outweigh
show examples
 the drawbacks of manual
work
Use synonyms
 and slow speed. To commence with,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 has undeniable cons of
excercise
Correct your spelling
exercise
 and zero fuel
usuage
Correct your spelling
usage
. First and foremost,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 is a manual way of transport
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
Linking Words
therefore
Punctuation problem
therefore,
show examples
 no energy is needed to make it
work
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 is a very
cost effective
Use the right word
cost-effective
show examples
 and efficient
mode
Use synonyms
 of commute.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
the bicycle
show examples
 works
manual
Check wording
apply
show examples
by pressing the
peddles
Use the right word
pedals
show examples
,
therefore
Linking Words
 body muscles
work
Use synonyms
 together to make it move. Many
people
Use synonyms
 use
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 as a
mode
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of excercise
show examples
excercise
Correct your spelling
exercise
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, riding
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 helps
people
Use synonyms
 to stay fit. To
examlify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
this
Linking Words
, almost all the gyms have cycles as
the part of
Correct word order
part of the
show examples
 exercise.
Thus
Linking Words
, it justifies that riding bicycles
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 positive impacts on health and it is
cost effective
Use the right word
cost-effective
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some negative
imapcts
Correct your spelling
impacts
 of using
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as low speed
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 makes it less effective
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 because of manual
use
Add a comma
use,
show examples
 it is not fit to use by everyone.
Bicycle
Use synonyms
 runs
maually
Correct your spelling
manually
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 speed
it
Use the right word
is
show examples
 very slow as compared to other modes
such
Linking Words
 as cars and buses. It is hard to commute
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
long
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
the bicycle
show examples
 works manual
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not a good fit for older
or
Correct word order
people or
show examples
people
Use synonyms
with
Correct determiner usage
those with
show examples
 physical disabilities. Older
people
Use synonyms
 have low stamina
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 they can not do
stresneous
Correct your spelling
strenuous
work
Use synonyms
 most of the time.
For instance
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 with physical disability
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as leg
amputation
Punctuation problem
amputation,
show examples
 can't ride
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
. These couple
Change preposition
of resons
show examples
resons
Correct your spelling
reasons
justifies
Correct subject-verb agreement
justify
show examples
 the drawbacks. In conclusion, bicycles are
cosidered
Correct your spelling
considered
 a very reliable
mode
Use synonyms
 of commute in metropolitan areas. The benefits of fuel efficiency and exercise opportunities outweigh the drawbacks of slow speed and
not
Verb problem
are not
show examples
fit
Correct word choice
suitable
show examples
 for all.

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organization
Plan your essay with a clear start, middle and end. Each paragraph should have one idea and a short example.
grammar
Fix all grammar errors. Change 'Although some are disagree' to 'Although some people disagree' and fix misspelt words.
coherence
Use simple linking words to show link and contrast, like 'but', 'also', 'however'.
vocabulary
Use correct spell and keep short, plain lines. Check words you use.
content
Give one clear example for the idea in each part to prove your point.
content
The essay shows both sides and gives a clear view.
structure
There is an intro and a end.
coherence
Some linking words are used to show contrast.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Zero Emissions
  • Cardiovascular Exercise
  • Cost-Effective
  • Traffic Congestion
  • Green Environment
  • Vulnerable to Accidents
  • Insufficient Bike Lanes
  • Weather Conditions
  • Urban Areas
  • Practicality
  • Infrastructure
What to do next:
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