IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart compares the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of total expenditure by five
age
Use synonyms
 groups in the UK on three categories in 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, the graph clearly shows that the highest percentage of spending on food and drink came from ages over 76, at a little over 20%.
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
they
Fix capitalization
They
show examples
 have the percentage of entertainment spending more than restaurant and hotel, they spent 13% and 7% respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, expenditure on restaurants and hotels shows a similar pattern among people aged below 60. The group under 30 accounts for 14%, which is the highest percentage in
this
Linking Words
 category.
While
Linking Words
 the other two groups, the aged 31- 45 and 46-60, have 12%, the same
proportion
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 trend.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the largest
proportion
Use synonyms
 for entertainment is the group
Use synonyms
age
Replace the word
aged
show examples
 between 61 and 75,
they
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 spent over 20% in
this
Linking Words
 segment.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by the 46–60
age
Use synonyms
 group, which accounted for 14%.
By comparison
Linking Words
, the proportions for those under 30 and those aged 31–45 were quite similar, at 7% and 8% respectively.
Lastly
Linking Words
, for food and drink, the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of expenditure increases as people get older. The
age
Use synonyms
under
Check wording
group under
show examples
 30 was the lowest spender in
this
Linking Words
 trend, they spent 6%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, age with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Expenditure
  • Categories
  • Age groups
  • Residents
  • Summarize
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Spending habits
  • Life stages
  • Childcare costs
  • Healthcare costs
  • Outliers
  • Economic factors
  • Social factors
  • Cultural factors
  • Leisure activities
  • Financial outlays
  • Demographics
  • Percentage
  • Allocation of funds
  • Consumption
  • Discretionary spending
  • Essential expenses
  • Generational differences
  • Income bracket
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