IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays many people read e-books instead of paper books. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In contemporary society, there is a debate
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e-
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about whether e-books
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books
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useful
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are useful
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 or
print
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books
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.
While
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e-
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books
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 have a lot of
benefits
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, I believe that
print
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books
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 are very comfortable. On the one
hand
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hand,
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e-
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books
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quite
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offer quite
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benefits
Correct determiner usage
a few benefits
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 for
bookworm
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bookworms
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.
Firstly
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, online
books
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 are easy to find
one
Correct determiner usage
a
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 novel or
story
Correct article usage
a story
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.
Due to
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at
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apply
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the internet avaliable all
story
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stories
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and novels
.
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are available.
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For example
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, "Blood
war
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War
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"
novel's
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novel,
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 my brother can not find on the market
but
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, but
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 after he read
this
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 book online.
Secondly
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, in the e-book doing notice for yourself,
this
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very
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is very
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extreamly
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extremely
 comfortable.
Although
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 these
benefits
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will
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apply
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may be
convinient
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convenient
,
print
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books
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 are appealing. First and foremost
for
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,
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print
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books
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 can help concentration
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,
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apply
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as well as
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 people can focus better when they read
print
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books
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.
As a result
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,
this
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 may help
person's
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a person's
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 brain with their memory.
Furthermore
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,
print
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books
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are
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do
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 not require electricity or internet. Individuals
to allow
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are allowed
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 to read them anywhere or anytime. In conclusion, despite
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e-
Check wording
e-books'
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books
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benefits
Add a comma
benefits,
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 I am of the opinion that
print
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books
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efficient
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are efficient
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our
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for our
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brain storm
Replace the word
brainstorming
. They can help our memory and have
not
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no
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 harmful sides and
also
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 we can take information about different cultures.
Books
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 can not hit our vision
as well as
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this
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 case encounter serious hazards
that
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apply
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associated with prolonged screen time.

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task response
Answer the question more clearly. Say why this change is good or bad from the start and keep this view all through the essay.
task response
Give fuller ideas. Each main point needs a short explanation of how or why it supports your view.
task response
Use one or two clear examples that directly fit your main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Make topic sentences easier to understand. Start each body paragraph with one clear main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, and as a result, but do not use too many.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence connects well to the next one. Some parts now feel broken or hard to follow.
task response
You give your opinion and keep it to the end.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear opening, two body parts, and a closing.
task response
You try to compare e-books and print books, which helps the reader see both sides.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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