The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is a common belief that
healthcare
Use synonyms
will worsen with time. I disagree with
such
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a statement, as I believe humanity is not only making huge advancements constantly in
this
Linking Words
field, but
also
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finding multiple innovative solutions to bureaucratic issues associated with health.
Firstly
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, medicine is developing at a rate
that is
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faster than ever. In the
last
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100 years, multiple diseases have been
erradicated
Correct your spelling
eradicated
that used to plague humanity, and
thus
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reduced
Use synonyms
healthcare
Correct article usage
the healthcare
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burden.
Due to
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the diligent work of doctors and researchers, more discoveries are made each day in order to benefit the population.
For example
Linking Words
, when the COVID outbreak occurred,
healthcare
Use synonyms
workers were able to craft vaccines to prevent
further
Linking Words
spread of
this
Linking Words
virus within months. These vaccines were developed rapidly,
thus
Linking Words
saving millions of lives. Another tool that will help our well-being
,
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apply
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is artificial
intellegence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
.
This
Linking Words
technology has incredible potential both to help the
healthcare
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system be more efficient
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
and to
further
Linking Words
our understanding of
this
Linking Words
field. In a research I read, medical professionals used artificial intelligence to
predice
Use the right word
predict
show examples
acute kidney injury before it occurred.
This
Linking Words
tool can be used to improve patient outcomes and make the system more efficient. Another improving factor
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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the governments themselves. With more and more good examples of public
systems
Check wording
health systems
show examples
of health, more institutions will be able to follow in other countries' footsteps in order to help their people. A prime occurrence of
this
Linking Words
is seen in the NHS, in the United Kingdom. In the NHS, many services are provided for free or
very
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at very
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affordable prices, without large waiting times for citizens of the United Kingdom. With the existence of functioning great systems like
this
Linking Words
, other nations can follow suit and in turn benefit their own
persons
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people
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. In conclusion, with more time comes more experience and advancements, and these improvements
well
Verb problem
will
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better the well-being of people. The innovation of new technologies in combination with more streamlined and practical systems
,
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apply
show examples
will be for the better of
healthcare
Use synonyms
in my opinion.

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task response
Make your main view even more clear in each body part.
task response
Add one more clear reason why health will get better, or explain one idea more deeply.
task response
Some examples are good, but make sure every example clearly proves your main point.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a more careful way. A few parts sound a bit long or not fully smooth.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph topic sentences so each one clearly shows the main idea of that part.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are too long. Split them to make the flow easier to follow.
task response
You answer the question clearly and give a clear opinion from the start.
task response
Your ideas are relevant and stay on the topic.
task response
You use real examples like COVID vaccines, AI, and the NHS to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear beginning, middle, and end.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are easy to see and mostly well ordered.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas connect in a logical way.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Standard of health
  • 2. Average
  • 3. Lower
  • 4. Future
  • 5. Aging population
  • 6. Chronic diseases
  • 7. Sedentary lifestyle
  • 8. Lack of exercise
  • 9. Poor dietary habits
  • 10. Environmental pollution
  • 11. Technological advancements
  • 12. Impact on health
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