IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In
this
Linking Words
 period of time,
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
pf
Correct your spelling
of
subjects
Use synonyms
happened
Wrong verb form
have emerged
show examples
 in nowadays
also
Linking Words
have
Wrong verb form
allowing
show examples
subjects
Use synonyms
 which
students
Use synonyms
can
Wrong verb form
to
show examples
 make
a decision by themselves
Fix the agreement mistake
their own decisions
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, some of
Use synonyms
subjects
Correct article usage
the subjects
show examples
 which
students
Use synonyms
 choose
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
 not match
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their goal can
amke
Correct your spelling
prevent
 them can not achieve their
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
show examples
. The following
paragrah
Correct your spelling
paragraph
 will
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
discuss both views. Regarding the advantages, if many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 can make a decision to choose the subject which they want to learn can make them quite keen on
this
Linking Words
 and
also
Linking Words
feeling enjoy
Replace the word
feel enjoyment
 and can improve their
skill
Check wording
skills
show examples
 and their mindset from the
subjects
Use synonyms
there
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 choose.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 can
known
Wrong verb form
know
show examples
 and
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 out which aspects they enjoy and can plan with them in
the
Correct article usage
their
show examples
future
Use synonyms
 career path.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
also
Linking Words
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 disadvantages
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 was
students
Use synonyms
can
Verb problem
are
show examples
 not
allow
Wrong verb form
allowed
show examples
 to study
subjects
Use synonyms
 that they choose
its
Correct word choice
because
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
subjects
Use synonyms
can
Verb problem
are
show examples
 not useful in the
future
Use synonyms
 and can not
be development
Replace the word
develop
 the skills useful in the
future
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 who learned from the
subjects
Use synonyms
 that
useful
Verb problem
are useful
show examples
 when in the
future
Use synonyms
 they can use the
skill
Check wording
skills
show examples
 from
this
Linking Words
 subject to improve and develop themselves. In conclusion, many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people think all university
students
Use synonyms
 should
to
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
study whatever they
quite
Verb problem
are quite
show examples
 keen on
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 some people trust that they should only be allowed to study
subjects
Use synonyms
 that will be useful in the
future
Use synonyms
. From
this
Linking Words
discussion
Punctuation problem
discussion,
show examples
 its have both advantages and disadvantages
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as people will be convenient and enjoy
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
aspects they like
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, from
this
Linking Words
 decision
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 the
Use synonyms
future
Punctuation problem
future,
show examples
 they will not have
skill
Check wording
skills
show examples
 useful for their career .

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task response
Answer both sides more clearly. You talk about both views, but your own idea is not clear enough.
task response
Add your opinion in the introduction and support it again in the conclusion.
task response
Use one clear main idea in each body paragraph, then explain it with a simple example.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has basic paragraph order, so it is easy to follow at times.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words are used, but many sentences are hard to follow because grammar and word form are often wrong.
coherence and cohesion
Make shorter sentences. This will help your ideas connect in a clear way.
task response
You discuss both views, which is important for this task.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words like however, moreover, and on the other hand.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • engagement
  • excel
  • innovative contributions
  • diversity in research
  • well-rounded education
  • broad perspectives
  • critical thinking skills
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • forced academic paths
  • job-ready
  • skills shortages
  • tech-driven economy
  • employment rates
  • changing job market
  • utilitarian subjects
  • aptitudes
  • wasting talent
What to do next:
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