IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In recent years, a large number of highly skilled professionals like doctors, engineers, and IT professionals from poorer countries are leaving their countries for better-paying jobs. What are the possible problems of this and what solutions can you suggest to deal with this issue?

In recent years immigration rate
have been
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 increased
due to
Linking Words
 low income.
Therefore
Linking Words
 employee try to find high- paying job in other modern countries to live
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 life. In my opinion, the challenges of finding carrier in
abrod
Correct your spelling
abroad
 nations
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 caused by overpopulation.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe that to solve
this
Linking Words
, the government plays a key role in de-escultation
such
Linking Words
 issues.
Initially
Linking Words
, the cause of
overpopulated
Replace the word
overpopulation
 is attributed to
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 immigration rate annually. Indeed, when the population grows, the number of
a student whose
Fix the agreement mistake
students who are
show examples
 enrolled in the same skills and the practice in the same professional increased as well.
As a result
Linking Words
, duplication of specialities and degrees
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
 accumulation. From
this
Linking Words
 point
in
Change preposition
,
show examples
 the problems start to appear. The inflation result imbalance in
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
 by
tighten the
Wrong verb form
tightening
show examples
 workplace opportunities, and
leave
Wrong verb form
leaving
show examples
 many fresh graduates without jobs.
This
Linking Words
 pressure and limited chance forced them to work overseas.
This
Linking Words
 happened in the most common sectors, namely, physicians, IT or engineers.
Recent
Correct article usage
A recent
show examples
 study and the
statistic
Check wording
statistics
show examples
 in Saudi Arabia
proven
Verb problem
have proven
show examples
 that 30% of doctors
tended
Wrong verb form
tend
show examples
 to work outside the kingdom because
no
Change preposition
of a lack of
show examples
 hiring availability for two years in a row. The solution to
this
Linking Words
 concern, the government is
key
Correct article usage
a key
show examples
 figure that could help
esea
Correct your spelling
address
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon. That said, creating
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
specialities in an effective way to solve the inflation and immigration.
For example
Linking Words
, the United States of America have launched a preparation year for newly graduated
this
Linking Words
 steps attempt to introduce the work market to students in order to facilitate job selection in
proper
Correct article usage
a proper
show examples
 way, not on what is common in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
previous decades .
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 executed plan, the inflation rate reduced
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 2 to 3 times comparing by the previous year.
Moreover
Linking Words
, universities should apply strict admission
seats
Check wording
criteria
show examples
 for
student
Check wording
students
show examples
 and match their qualifications
according to
Linking Words
 the
need
Check wording
needs
show examples
 of
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
. In conclusion,
The
Fix capitalization
the
show examples
 high numbers of foreign people working outside their mother country can
tackle throughout
Verb problem
help
show examples
 improve the variety of professionals,
additional
Correct word choice
in addition
show examples
 to
smart
Correct word choice
a large
show examples
 number of
a student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 in each subject,
according to
Linking Words
 the workforce demand.

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task response
Answer both parts more clearly. Say the problems first, then give solutions in a direct way.
coherence and cohesion
Your main ideas are good, but some are hard to follow. Use short and clear sentences.
task response
Support each main point with one clear example and explain it more.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a simple way, like First, Also, As a result, and In conclusion.
task response
Stay close to the topic. Focus on skilled workers leaving poor countries, not only on population growth.
task response
You gave both problems and solutions, so you answered the full question.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You used an example about doctors to support your point.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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