These days in some countries an increasing number of young adults are choosing their whole weekends inside homes. Why do you think it is happening ? Is this a positive or negative development?

With the development of novel technologies and tendencies in

modern

Correct article usage

the modern

show examples

vocational

sector

Punctuation problem

sector,

show examples

most of the young professional are more into staying at their homes rather than engaging with the

outer

Correct word choice

outside

show examples

world. From my

perspective

Punctuation problem

perspective,

show examples

their workaholic attitudes and hectic

life styles

Correct your spelling

lifestyles

are the immediate reasons for

this

Linking Words

trend

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

the trend is considered a negative development.

To begin

Linking Words

, it is no secret that the competitive working environment in conglomerates

pave

Correct subject-verb agreement

paves

show examples

the way for modern individuals to keep in touch with their

caree

Correct your spelling

career

aspects. More importantly, talented and dedicated cooperative figures are given numerous financial and non financial benifits ,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

would attract their focus on career pathways.

As a result

Linking Words

, a limited time is provided

them

Change preposition

to them

show examples

to manage their

houshold

Correct your spelling

household

chores and family responsibilities ,

such

Linking Words

as parenthood. In that aspect,

such

Linking Words

workers

litteraly

Correct your spelling

literally

struggle with

full fledged

Correct your spelling

full-fledged

working plans and

result oriented

Correct your spelling

result-oriented

working performance.

For example

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

recent research statistics ,modern working moms prefer to stay at homes in weekend and holidays ,in order to mould their young buds.

Further

Linking Words

, they stated that they deal with time management issues on work-life balance ,since they consider weekends and holidays

are

Wrong verb form

to be

show examples

the perfect opportunities to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

their requirements.

Further

Linking Words

, the trend sheds light on its destructive nature. It is worth noticing the fact that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

human is a social

being

Fix the agreement mistake

beings

show examples

and they should interact with their

surrounding

Replace the word

surroundings

to maintain the communal well-being. Unless

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they would suffer from

non communicable

Correct your spelling

non-communicable

diseases and mental disorders.

On the other hand

Linking Words

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

show examples

are highly

effected

Use the right word

affected

show examples

by the

decreasing the engagment

Replace the word

decrease in engagement

valubale

Correct your spelling

valuable

customers.

Moreover

Linking Words

, recreational activity based business are highly demanded

Change preposition

show examples

weekends and holidays. In that aspect, economic collapses could be caused by

unpresented

Correct word choice

unrepresented

show examples

customers ,since they do not engage with society.

For example

Linking Words

according to

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a recent research on mental health reveals that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

a considerable

amount

Check wording

number

show examples

of South Asian young employees tend to suffer from high blood pressure and

lonliness

Replace the word

loneliness

due to

Linking Words

their ignorance of engaging in communal activities. More pathetically, lack of exercise

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

them to maintain sedentary

life styles

Correct your spelling

lifestyles

. Looking from an

overall

Linking Words

perspective

Punctuation problem

perspective,

show examples

it is evident that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

'Change is inevitable'. In that aspect, every communal figure should step forward to

realize

Change the spelling

realise

show examples

the

imporatnace

Correct your spelling

importance

of work-life balance, in order to achieve a high degree of health aspects and social values.

Hence

Linking Words

, they should follow time

managment

Correct your spelling

management

techniques to

living

Wrong verb form

live

show examples

balance

Replace the word

balanced

life.

Moreover

Linking Words

, governing bodies should adress

this

Linking Words

pressing issues by introducing flexbile working environment to ensure

economic

Correct article usage

the economic

show examples

and social values of their citizens.

prrandulaperera

Mar 27, 2026

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task response

Answer both parts in a more direct way. Say clearly why this happens and why it is bad.

coherence and cohesion

Keep your main idea simple in each body paragraph. Do not add too many big ideas in one part.

task response

Use examples that are clear and easy to trust. Some examples now feel too general.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas with simple words like first, also, because, so, and in the end.

coherence and cohesion

Check that each sentence connects well to the next one. Some parts now feel hard to follow.

task response

You answered both questions and gave your opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.

task response

You try to support your ideas with examples.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

412 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

young adults
stay indoors
spend weekends at home
busy week
feel tired
rest and relax
save money
high cost of living
online entertainment
stream films
play video games
order food
work or study pressure
feel safe at home
avoid crowded places
social life
real-life contact
physical health
mental health
negative development
positive development
overall trend
in the long run
lose social skills
become less active

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