IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

some people say that devoting one's time to family activities is more important than spending time working. Others believe that dedicating one's time to work is more inportant? discuss both view and give ur own opinion

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coherence cohesion
Write a clear intro, two body parts, and a short end.
coherence cohesion
Use simple link words like first, also, however, and in my view.
coherence cohesion
Support each main point with one clear reason or example.
task achievement
Answer all parts of the task: both views and your own opinion.
task achievement
Make your ideas clear and full. Do not keep them too short.
task achievement
Add real and clear examples to make your points strong.
task achievement
The topic is clear and easy to understand.
coherence cohesion
The question asks for both views and your opinion, which gives a clear plan.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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