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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the consumption of wheat, rice, maize in 4 different countries.

The table gives the information about the number of
consumption
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 (
calories
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 per person per
day
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) of certain commodities, including
rice
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,
wheat
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, and
maize
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 in four
countries
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,
such
Linking Words
 as
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Cambodi
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
,
Poland
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, Egypt, and
Mexico
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
highest
Correct word choice
most
show examples
 popular food
consumption
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 is from
rice
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which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is used in
Use synonyms
Cambodi
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
,
whereas
Linking Words
wheat
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 and
maize
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 are the most used as a staple food for
Poland
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, Egypt and
Mexico
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, respectively. The
rice
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 commodity is highly used in
Use synonyms
Cambodi
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
 with notably 1445
calories
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 per person per
day
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, placing the first position among
the
Correct article usage
apply
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other
countries
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
Mexico
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 has
a
Correct determiner usage
maize
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Maize
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 as a popular
of
Change preposition
apply
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staple food in society with 1083
intake
Check wording
apply
show examples
calories
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each
Change preposition
per
show examples
 person per
day
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. The other commodity,
wheat
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, is not quite popular in these two
countries
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with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 only 18 and 275
consumption
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 for
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Cambodi
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
 and
Mexico
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, respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
wheat
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 is more popular in
Poland
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 and Egypt
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 865 and 1095
calories
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 intake per
day
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, respectively.
Rice
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 and
maize
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 commodities are not quite popular in these two
countries
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, especially in
Poland
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, where
rice
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 and
maize
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dramatically
Verb problem
are consumed
show examples
 only reaches 19
consumption
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 and 0
consumption
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, respectively.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, calories, day, rice, wheat, maize, countries, cambodi, poland, mexico with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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