IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that governments should spend more money on public transportation, while others think that building more roads is a better solution to traffic problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many people think that governments should allocate more funds in order to improve public
transport
Use synonyms
.
However
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, some people considered that establishing more routes is the most effective method to reduce congestion
problems
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. I
strongely
Correct your spelling
strongly
 agree with developing and supporting transportation in the country.
Firstly
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, officials should invest more to add better options for public
transport
Use synonyms
usages
Check wording
usage
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.
For example
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, establishing more railways and
enhance
Wrong verb form
enhancing
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 the metro system in the nation.
As a result
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 , the amount of toxic
emssions
Correct your spelling
emissions
 will
significantly be
Correct word order
be significantly
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 reduced. Another benefit to consider is that the air quality of areas will be improved and
becomes
Wrong verb form
become
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 fresh and clean.
Consequently
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, many issues will decrease ,
such
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 as health and financial
problems
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that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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caused by air pollution.
On the other hand
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, many individuals think it is more beneficial to expand roads and
allowing
Wrong verb form
allow
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 many vehicles to be
in
Change preposition
on
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 the same route. They claim that will
decline
Verb problem
reduce
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 the traffic
problems
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 mostly
happend
Correct your spelling
happen
 because of narrow routes.
Also
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, many workers prefer to use their own cars , so adding more roads will make their journeys easy and convenient.
However
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, the usage of private vehicles could be considered
as
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apply
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the primary factor of air pollution. In conclusion, governments can solve various
problems
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 by developing the
transport
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 system and expanding routes.
Furthermore
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, reliance on the use of public
transport
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 ,
instead
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 of private
cars
Punctuation problem
cars,
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 has remarkable advantages in many aspects.I think these measures
essentialy
Correct your spelling
essentially
 improve the environment and make the place safe
of
Change preposition
for
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 future generations.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You mention both views, but the side about more roads is shorter and less developed.
task response
Give a clearer opinion in the introduction and keep it strong in the body. Your view is present, but some parts are not fully direct.
task response
Use one clear example to support each main idea. Your ideas are relevant, but they need more specific support.
coherence and cohesion
Make topic sentences clearer at the start of each body paragraph so the reader can follow your main point easily.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple and correct words. Some linking words are used, but there are spaces and sentence joins that make reading less smooth.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each paragraph in a more balanced way. The first body paragraph has more support than the second one.
task response
You discuss both public transport and road building, so you address the full question.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
Your opinion is clear: you support public transport more than building roads.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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