IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, more and more foreign students are going to English-Speaking countries to learn the “international language – English". It is undoubtedly true that studying English in an English-speaking country is the best way, but it is not the only way to learn it. Do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
There are two schools of thought on whether
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 studying
English
Use synonyms
 in an
English
Use synonyms
-speaking
country
Use synonyms
 is the best way or not. I firmly believe that there is no doubt that studying
English
Use synonyms
 in an
English
Use synonyms
-speaking
country
Use synonyms
 is the best way to learn it
,
Punctuation problem
; however
show examples
hence
Linking Words
, it is not the only way.
Body paragraph 1
Use synonyms
English-speaking
Correct article usage
An English-speaking
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 consists
an
Change preposition
of an
show examples
 environment where every
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
 around a foreign
student
Use synonyms
 speaks in
English
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
important prior stage to
adopt
Verb problem
learning
show examples
English
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, when a
student
Use synonyms
go
Correct subject-verb agreement
goes
show examples
 through
such
Linking Words
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
 situation, the situation
oblige
Correct subject-verb agreement
obliges
show examples
 the
student
Use synonyms
 to speak up in
English
Use synonyms
. If a
student
Use synonyms
afraid to rise up
Correct word order
is afraid to raise
show examples
 his or her voice in
English
Use synonyms
, he or she can not learn
English
Use synonyms
 in my perspective. It
also
Linking Words
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to make the
student
Use synonyms
 confident about speaking
English
Use synonyms
.
Body paragraph 2
Accent
Use synonyms
 among the residents of
Use synonyms
English
Correct word choice
English-speaking
show examples
 countries is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
another important thing to consider for a
student
Use synonyms
. To
cop up
Verb problem
cope
show examples
 with
such
Linking Words
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
types of
Use synonyms
accent
Punctuation problem
accent,
show examples
 a person should
have
Verb problem
be
show examples
 used to
with
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
this
Linking Words
. One can learn
English
Use synonyms
by the
Change preposition
through
show examples
 many other media that
are existing
Wrong verb form
exist
show examples
nowadays
Punctuation problem
nowadays,
show examples
 facilitated by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern technology
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 the actual
English
Use synonyms
accent
Use synonyms
 is
much more
Rephrase
very
show examples
 different from it and not
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
easy to learn without
practice
Wrong verb form
practising
show examples
 it in your
day to day
Correct your spelling
day-to-day
 life.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
accent
Correct article usage
an accent
show examples
 could make
feel the
Correct word order
a student feel like an
show examples
student
Use synonyms
 as
English
Use synonyms
 resident
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
also
Linking Words
reflect
Correct subject-verb agreement
reflects
show examples
 in their attitudes.
Conclusion
In view of the aforementioned facts and circumstances, there is no doubt that a
student
Use synonyms
 can learn
English
Use synonyms
 from any kind of process
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 learning
English
Use synonyms
 from an
English
Use synonyms
-speaking
country
Use synonyms
 may help a
student
Use synonyms
 a lot
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it must boost up his or her confidence.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer the question more fully. You agree, but you also need to explain clearly why it is not the only way.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer main ideas in each body paragraph. One paragraph can be about daily use, and one can be about other ways to learn.
task response
Give one real and clear example. Your example now is general, so it does not strongly support your point.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simpler way. Some sentences are hard to follow because the words do not connect well.
task response
Make your conclusion match your opinion exactly. Say clearly: it is the best way, but not the only way.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
The main topic stays on learning English in an English-speaking country.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: