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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the amount of fruit produced in four countries (France, Spain, Germany, Turkey) from 1970 to 2010.

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The line graph depicts the number of
fruits
Use synonyms
 in
tons
Use synonyms
 produced in four countries in the period from 1970 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 time
period
Add a comma
period,
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 the four countries experienced various trends. As France and Turkey had substantial and gradual
increase
Check wording
increases
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, respectively, the produced
fruits
Use synonyms
 in Spain and Germany saw
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
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 decline. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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can be seen from the graph, France started
at
Change preposition
with
show examples
 1
Use synonyms
tons
Fix the agreement mistake
ton
show examples
 of yielded
fruits
Use synonyms
 in 1970 and remained the same, before
moderate
Correct article usage
a moderate
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 increase in 1990
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2
tons
Use synonyms
. After it decreased slightly to nearly 1,8
tons
Use synonyms
 in 2000, it witnessed
rocket
Correct article usage
a rocket
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 in 2010 by 3
tons
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 Turkey, there was
gradual
Correct article usage
a gradual
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 climb in fruit yield crops from 2
tons
Use synonyms
 in 1970 to just about 3
tons
Use synonyms
 in 2010.
By contrast
Linking Words
, Spain reached a peak in 1970 when
their produce
Fix the agreement mistake
its production
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 of
fruits
Use synonyms
 stood at very nearly 5,8
tons
Use synonyms
, before
plunge
Correct article usage
a plunge
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 in 1980 and 2010 by 5,2 and 5
tons
Use synonyms
,
in turn
Rephrase
respectively
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. Regarding
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Germany's generation of
fruits
Use synonyms
, in 1970 they produced about 2,8
tons
Use synonyms
, but
then
Linking Words
 their production plummeted to 1,2
tons
Use synonyms
 in 1980, before it levelled off in 2010.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words fruits, tons with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • produce
  • trends
  • decrease/increase
  • production
  • peak
  • fluctuation
  • stability
  • volatility
  • significant
  • milestone
  • conjecture
  • harvest
  • agricultural
  • yield
  • decade
  • data representation
  • timespan
  • graph analysis
  • comparative
  • rankings
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