IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
The line graph illustrates the proportions of
exports
Use synonyms
 from Australia to four countries: Japan,
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
, China and India between 1990 and 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest rate of Australian
exports
Use synonyms
 was in China in
Use synonyms
year
Check wording
apply
show examples
2012,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest ratio was in India in that
year
Use synonyms
. On the
orher
Correct your spelling
other
 hand, the highest fluctuation over the 20 years was in China
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
in contrast
Linking Words
, Australian
exports
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Japan were at
the
Correct article usage
their
show examples
 highest
then
Linking Words
descreas
Correct your spelling
decreased
 over 20 years. In detail,
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 proportion remained relatively stable between 1990 and 2012,
whereas
Linking Words
 the ratio of Japan was at
the
Correct article usage
its
show examples
 highest
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 remained steady. Interestingly, many of
Australian export
Check wording
Australia's exports
show examples
 were around 25
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
year
Correct article usage
the year
show examples
 1990, and it is nearly
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
recently
Correct word choice
same
show examples
 percentage which is around more than 25
percent
Use synonyms
 in
Use synonyms
year
Check wording
apply
show examples
2012. Examining data
further
Linking Words
, the rate of
exports
Use synonyms
 in India
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 equal between 1990 and 2000,
while
Linking Words
 it
jumbed
Verb problem
jumped
show examples
 from around 1
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 to around 5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in over 10 years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words exports, year, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Line graph
  • Percentage
  • Exports
  • Trend analysis
  • Upward/downward trend
  • Fluctuation
  • Comparison
  • Peak performance
  • Decline
  • Stability
  • Significant
  • Inferred
  • Global events
  • Economic context
  • Reflect
  • Influence
  • Patterns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: