IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
The global
availability
Use synonyms
 of
food
Use synonyms
 in
supermarkets
Use synonyms
 is a phenomenon that has transformed the way people shop and eat.
Consumers
Use synonyms
 can now purchase
food
Use synonyms
 produced all over the world, a
development
Use synonyms
 that brings both positive and negative aspects. On balance, I believe that
this
Linking Words
 is a positive
development
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 the benefits it provides in terms of
variety
Use synonyms
, quality, and economic opportunities.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the
availability
Use synonyms
 of international
food
Use synonyms
 products in
supermarkets
Use synonyms
 significantly increases
variety
Use synonyms
.
Consumers
Use synonyms
 have access to a diverse range of foods that were previously unavailable or hard to find.
This
Linking Words
 enables people to enjoy different cuisines and
flavors
Change the spelling
flavours
show examples
, enriching their culinary experiences.
For instance
Linking Words
, individuals in the United States can easily find French cheeses, Japanese sushi ingredients, and tropical fruits from South America.
This
Linking Words
variety
Use synonyms
 not only satisfies diverse tastes but
also
Linking Words
 encourages cultural exchange and understanding through
food
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, access to global
food
Use synonyms
 products can improve the quality of diets.
Supermarkets
Use synonyms
 can offer a broader range of fresh produce and healthy options from around the world, providing
consumers
Use synonyms
 with better nutritional choices.
For example
Linking Words
, during off-seasons, importing fruits and vegetables from other countries ensures that
consumers
Use synonyms
 can maintain a balanced diet year-round.
This
Linking Words
 constant
availability
Use synonyms
 of fresh produce helps combat nutritional deficiencies and promotes healthier eating habits.
However
Linking Words
, it is important to acknowledge the negative impacts of
this
Linking Words
development
Use synonyms
. The environmental cost of transporting
food
Use synonyms
 over long distances is significant. The carbon footprint associated with international
food
Use synonyms
 trade contributes to climate change and environmental degradation.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the emphasis on imported goods can sometimes undermine local agriculture, as
consumers
Use synonyms
 may prefer foreign products over locally grown produce, leading to potential economic difficulties for local farmers. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 the global
availability
Use synonyms
 of
food
Use synonyms
 in
supermarkets
Use synonyms
 presents environmental challenges, the benefits in terms of
variety
Use synonyms
, quality, and economic opportunities make it a positive
development
Use synonyms
overall
Linking Words
. By promoting cultural exchange, improving dietary options, and supporting economic growth in developing countries,
this
Linking Words
 trend enhances the global
food
Use synonyms
 landscape.
However
Linking Words
, it is crucial to find a balance by encouraging sustainable practices and supporting local agriculture to mitigate the negative impacts. Word Count: 348

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Make your main idea even more clear in each body part.
task response
Add one more clear example for the bad side to make your answer more full.
task response
Your answer is clear, but some ideas could be explained in a deeper way.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with more care so each part flows in a more natural way.
coherence and cohesion
Some points are good, but a few could connect more directly to your main opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Try to make each paragraph follow one clear central idea only.
task response
You answer both sides and give a clear opinion.
task response
Your ideas are relevant and easy to understand.
task response
You use examples that fit the topic well.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is logical and easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Paragraphing is clear and helps the reader.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
What to do next:
Look at other essays: