IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The two maps show a park in 1920 and in present. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The two maps illustrate the layout of the Grange
Park
Use synonyms
 in 1920 and at present.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
park
Use synonyms
 has undergone significant changes, with the introduction of new
features
Use synonyms
, facilities and recreational areas
including
Punctuation problem
, including
show examples
a
Correct article usage
an
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 amphitheatre for concerts. In 1920, the most
dominent
Correct your spelling
dominant
features
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 the fountain and the stage for the musicians to keep the
visiters
Correct your spelling
visitors
 entertained. At that
time
Punctuation problem
time,
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 there were a lot of natural
features
Use synonyms
including,
Correct word order
, including
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 multiple rose gardens, a pond with water plants and
Linking Words
also with
Change preposition
apply
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a glasshouse to enjoy the natural beauty of the
park
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 spending time indoors. At present, when
comaparing
Correct your spelling
comparing
 with the past, the
park
Use synonyms
 has transformed in to more modernised
park
Use synonyms
 with newly added
features
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as a cafe, a children's play area, a water feature and
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 amphitheatre for shows. Importantly, an underground car
park
Use synonyms
 facilitates the required parking area for the visitors, which is located
in
Change preposition
on
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 the right side
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the Eldon Street entrance.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 the fountain has been replaced by a
square shaped
Correct your spelling
square-shaped
 rose garden with
organized
Change the spelling
organised
show examples
 seats around it.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 the stage was transformed in to a amphitheatre to perform concerts
instead
Linking Words
 of just playing music like in the past.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
 the
park
Use synonyms
 has changed significantly, the entrances
are
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 remained constant.
Norticably
Correct your spelling
Notably
, the
park
Use synonyms
 facilitates less seats and rose garden areas than in 1920.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words park, features with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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