Some people use social media to keep in touch with other people and news events. Do you think advantage of technology outweigh the disadvantages

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In recent years,
useing
Correct your spelling
using
social
media
Use synonyms
to keep in touch has become
increasing
Rephrase
increasingly
show examples
common,
while
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this
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trend brings certain advantages, I believe
that
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is
Correct determiner usage
the
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advantages far outweigh disavantages. On the one hand,
useing
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using
social
media
Use synonyms
to connect
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
other offers
numberous
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numerous
demerits to society. One of the most notable drawbacks is
reduce
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reduced
social interaction, even
the
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in
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close
relationship
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relationships
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,
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;
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they usually keep in touch
on line
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online
,
replaced face to face, sometimes
Correct word order
replacing face-to-face contact. Sometimes,
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we
will
Verb problem
may
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misunderstand something. Another negative thing about
this
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trend is
Use synonyms
people
Correct word choice
that people
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lack social communication skills. Nowadays,
people
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rely
heavy
Rephrase
heavily
show examples
on
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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, we usually use
message
Check wording
messages
show examples
and
emoji
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emojis
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to text
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others.
However
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, in real
life
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life,
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people
Use synonyms
use body language or do something repersent polite and love, more and more
people
Use synonyms
lose
this
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ability.
For example
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, some young
people
Use synonyms
prefer texting than make a phone call, because they
afraid
Verb problem
are afraid
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commmunication with
tallk
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others
.
On the other hand
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, using social
media
Use synonyms
creats siginificant
Correct your spelling
creates significant
merits.
Firstly
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, it is convenient.
People
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can sent the information
for
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to
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everyone
by one
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at the same
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time.
For instance
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, the wedding
inviting
Replace the word
invitation
card posts on social
media
Use synonyms
has became
Correct subject-verb agreement
have become
show examples
more
popuar
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popular
, and all friends will get
this
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information immediately.
Furthermore
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, it is flexible
,
Punctuation problem
;
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people
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can text message anytime and anywhere.
For instance
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,
people
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can easily
conect
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connect
to
different countries
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people from different countries
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people
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, not
beacuse
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because of
the time lag. Another positive thing is that
can
Correct pronoun usage
it can
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reduce social stress. If we reject someone's invite, it will not become
embarrased
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embarrassing
. In conclusion,
although
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some negative impacts on using social
media
Use synonyms
to keep in touch,
such
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as
reduce
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reduced
interaction and
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
social
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of social
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communication skills, I believe that the
convenient
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convenience, flexibility
,
flexible
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apply
show examples
and
reduce
Replace the word
reduced
social stress are far more profound
disavantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
.

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task response
Answer the question more directly. Say clearly why the good points are stronger than the bad points.
task response
Add one more clear example for each main idea. This will make your ideas stronger.
task response
Develop each point more. Do not only name the idea; explain how and why it happens.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, and for example.
coherence and cohesion
Make some sentences shorter and easier to follow. This will help the reader understand your meaning.
task response
You answered both sides and gave your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You used examples about weddings, young people, and online contact.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • keep in touch
  • stay connected
  • social media platform
  • instant message
  • share updates
  • breaking news
  • real-time information
  • false information
  • fake news
  • trusted source
  • face-to-face communication
  • screen time
  • online pressure
  • daily life
  • low-cost communication
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