IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vechiles will be passengers. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In the coming years, the majority of people will use
vehicles
Use synonyms
 without a driver, and the individuals inside them will be passengers.
This
Linking Words
 essay will argue that despite the imminent threat behind these
cars
Use synonyms
, buses, and trucks, there are many advantages,
such
Linking Words
 as saving time and comfort. There is no doubt that driverless
vehicles
Use synonyms
 are not perfect, and one tiny mistake from them can cause a disaster. In the current situation, there are many corporations that make efforts to construct the ideal remote car that the roads can accommodate. These attempts had many threats to our roads and streets that no one
able
Verb problem
was able
show examples
 to avoid the consequences if the
vehicles
Use synonyms
being
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 out of control.
For example
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, a breaking news
from
Check wording
report from
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 CNN has confirmed that the
cars
Use synonyms
 from TESLA are not efficient
to deal
Change preposition
in dealing
show examples
 with, which may lead to a car accident.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the comfortable seat in front of the air conditioner that these types of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 afford is worth dealing with the consequences. Many individuals need to be comfortable and deal with something
else
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
other than driving to manage their time. These types of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 can make the passengers satisfied in their free time.
For instance
Linking Words
, the government of Saudi Arabia has confirmed that the citizens who deal with driverless
cars
Use synonyms
 are 88% more effective than those who
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
 not. In conclusion, it is expected that the civilians in
coming
Correct article usage
the coming
show examples
 years will travel through driverless
cars
Use synonyms
, and the comfort that it affords far outweighs any drawbacks.

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task response
Make your main answer more clear from the start. Say clearly that the good points are more than the bad points.
task response
Explain the bad points more fully. You say there is danger, but you need one or two clear reasons and results.
task response
Your examples do not feel strong or sure. Use simple and real examples, or explain your own example more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Put your ideas in a more clear order. One paragraph for bad points, one for good points, and link each idea step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow. Keep sentences shorter and use clear link words like first, also, however, and as a result.
coherence and cohesion
Support each main point with a direct explanation. Do not move too fast from one idea to another.
task response
You answer the question and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear paragraph for each side of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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