More and more people nowadays visit well-known places to take photographs of themselves, without looking at the place. Why do you think this is happening? Is it a positive or a negative trend? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, many people visit famous tourist attractions mainly to take photographs of themselves rather than truly experiencing the place.
This
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trend is largely driven by the influence of social
media
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and the desire to gain social attention. In my opinion,
this
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is a negative development because it reduces the real value of
travel
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and cultural appreciation. One of the major reasons for
this
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trend is the influence of social
media
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.
This
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is because people, especially the younger generation, are largely driven by social
media
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platforms
such
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as Instagram, Facebook, and Snapchat, where sharing
travel
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pictures has become a common way to gain attention and social approval.
As a result
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, they may neglect the true cultural and historical values of these places in order to impress their followers. Another important reason for
this
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phenomenon is showcasing social status. Several individuals visit famous tourist destinations to create an impressive image
,
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and to show their luxurious lifestyle.
For instance
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, many individuals visiting places like Paris or Dubai are more interested in taking pictures near famous monuments rather than learning about their history or cultural importance.
For
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this
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reason,
travel
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becomes more about online appearance than genuine experience. In conclusion, the growing habit of visiting famous destinations mainly for capturing memories is largely caused by social
media
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influence. I believe
this
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is a negative trend because it reduces
the
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genuine cultural appreciation
and
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, and
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travel
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turns into a way of seeking social attention over personal experience.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. You say why this happens and why it is bad, but your ideas can go deeper.
task response
Give one clear example with more detail. Your Paris and Dubai example is useful, but it is still general.
task response
Explain your main points more. Show how photo taking can hurt real travel and learning.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow, but some link words are used too much, like 'this is because' and 'for this reason'. Try more variety.
coherence and cohesion
Some body paragraphs are a bit short in support. Add one more sentence to develop each main idea.
task response
You clearly give your opinion in the introduction and keep it to the end.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure: introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one main idea, so the reader can follow your meaning well.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Visual content
  • Landmarks
  • Likes and followers
  • Selfie
  • Trophy
  • Validation
  • Accomplishment
  • Technological advancements
  • Smartphone cameras
  • Photography-focused tourism
  • Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
  • Immersing
  • Local economy
  • Cultural significance
  • Backdrops
  • Photographic evidence
  • Overcrowding
  • Wear and tear
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