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Writing Samples
Band 5

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours of sunshine per year in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.

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Overall
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, it is immediately clear that New
York
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 and
London
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 experience their higher
temperatures
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 in mid-year,
whereas
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 Sydney follows the opposite pattern, with peak
temperatures
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 occurring at the beginning and end of the year. In terms of sunshine, New
York
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 receives the greatest number of
hours
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 annually,
while
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London
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 has by far the lowest. New
York
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 shows the most dramatic temperature variation, beginning the year around 5
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Celsius
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degrees Celsius
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 and rising sharply to a peak of approximately 30
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Celsius
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degrees Celsius
show examples
 in July.
After
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this
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 point,
temperatures
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 fall rapidly, returning to roughly 5 degrees
Celsius
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 by December.
London
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 follows a similar pattern but with milder fluctuations, increasing gradually from about 7 °C in January to just over 20
Celsius
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 in July before declining steadily towards the end of year.
In contrast
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, Sydney displays a reverse seasonal trend.
Temperatures
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 start at around 25 C in January,
then
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 decline to their lowest point of roughly 15 °C in July. After mid-year, the temperature rises again, reaching around 26 °C by December. The table shows that New
York
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 receives the highest amount of sunshine annually, at 2,535
hours
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, closely followed by Sydney with 2,473
hours
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.
London
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,
however
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, records only 1,180
hours
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, less than half of the figure for the other two cities.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words york, london, temperatures, hours, celsius with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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