IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people feel that governments should take a large proportion of people’s salaries to pay necessary public services such as roads and schools. Others feel that high taxes are a bad thing. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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People hold different views about whether goverment should collect
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 portion of citizens' income to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 the public
services
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 so many think that high taxation is
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 for
well-being
Correct article usage
a well-being
show examples
 society, others argue that it place burden on middle-class families. In
this
Linking Words
 essay,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 will
disscuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
 both the perspectives and
then
Linking Words
 present my opinion. On the one hand,
Taking
Correct determiner usage
taking a
show examples
 high amount of
tax
Use synonyms
 from the
citizens'
Check wording
citizens
show examples
 can
improving
Wrong verb form
improve
show examples
 and
maintaning
Wrong verb form
maintain
show examples
 the
services
Use synonyms
. It can be
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 as a goverment schools' funding, maintaining roads and improving hospital assistance for
peoples
Check wording
people
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
individual
Correct article usage
an individual
show examples
 has to pay 30% of
his salaries
Fix the agreement mistake
their salary
show examples
 as a
tax
Use synonyms
 to preserve the
services
Use synonyms
. If
authority
Correct article usage
the authority
show examples
 does not do that,
they
Fix the agreement mistake
it
show examples
 will struggle to provide national benefits to the public. Without adequate
tax
Use synonyms
 revenue, higher administration can't provide high quality benifits to the people.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Taking
Correct determiner usage
taking a
show examples
 high amount of
tax
Use synonyms
 revenue from the people can reduce the individuals' financial freedom.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
fells
Wrong verb form
feels
show examples
 demotivated at the
work-place
Correct your spelling
workplace
 and can not focus on their personal life. High taxes can put
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pressure on
persons' life
Check wording
people's lives
show examples
 to work more or
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
 higher-paying jobs.
Additionally
Linking Words
, some argue that
governance
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
 do not always use
tax
Use synonyms
reveue
Correct your spelling
revenue
 efficiently. In conclusion, balance is
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
. Taxes should be high enough to fund the public
services
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, goverment should
to
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
make
rule
Correct article usage
a rule
show examples
about
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 higher earners
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 to pay more
tax
Use synonyms
 rather than the middle-class families,
while
Linking Words
 those with lower income
protected
Verb problem
are protected
show examples
 from financial burden.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully and make your own view very clear from the start.
task response
Add one more clear reason for each side and explain each idea a little more.
task response
Use a more direct example with real detail, not only a general idea about tax.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each paragraph and link it clearly to the next idea.
coherence and cohesion
Check word order and small link words so the writing is easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences and make sure each next sentence supports that topic.
task response
You discuss both views and give your own opinion in the end.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use basic link words like on the one hand, on the other hand, and in conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion of salary
  • Necessary public services
  • Economic growth
  • Quality of life
  • Redistributing wealth
  • Discourage
  • Motivation and productivity
  • Favorable tax conditions
  • Infringement on personal freedom
  • Balanced approach
  • Progressive tax system
  • Economic activity
  • Financial growth
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