Some people think that universities should only teach subjects that are useful for future careers. Others believe that subjects such as history, music and art are equally important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals believe that in universities we should
study
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modules that are
nessesary
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necessary
for our future job.Others argue that additional studies like history, music and
art
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are
also
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important.
This
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essay will argue that
although
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studying
art
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,history and music will improve your creativity and cognitive thinking , learning only a chosen
subject
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will give you more focus and free time on the
subject
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Learning non-essential educational
program
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programs
show examples
such
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as history, music and
art
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will make you more creative and intelligent , which is good
thesethis
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these
days.Painting a photo or learning to play on instruments makes you think about the world differently , so you can understant world from different angles.
For example
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, Bill Gates studied
art
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in college ,
while
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his main
subject
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was computer science. After
art
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classes, he made
Apple company
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Apple's
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design more beatiful which
makes
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made
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Apple more successful
On the other hand
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, going only for your main classes gives you no need to worry about something else and give more free time for your project and homework.If you
study
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a lot of non-essential subjects, you will end up with a whole
unfinished
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lot of unfinished
show examples
homework and projects , and eventually it will decrease your GPA.
For instance
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, my friend was studying in universiti in Usa , but he didn't take any subjects
othersubjects
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other
than his main
instead
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, he was working on his startup at
thatthis
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that
time , and now he is the CEO of his company. In conclusion i think it is better to
study
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only your main
subject
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than to
study
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with a lot of unnecessary subjects

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You talk about both views, but the first side needs a clearer reason and better support.
task response
Give a clear opinion in the introduction and keep it the same to the end.
task response
Use examples that are true or more natural. The example about Bill Gates and Apple is not clear and may be wrong.
coherence and cohesion
Make each main idea easy to follow. Start each body paragraph with one clear main point.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, for example, and as a result.
coherence and cohesion
Develop your points more. After each reason, explain how or why it is important.
task response
You answered both views and gave your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You try to use examples to support your ideas.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
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