IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows information about calorie consumption in seven countries in 1975 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The bar chart depicts information about
calorie
Use synonyms
 intake in seven
countries
Use synonyms
 in 1975 and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, in
2000
Punctuation problem
2000,
show examples
 it can be seen that the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
calorie
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 in seven
countries
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 much higher than
1975
Change preposition
in 1975
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in 1975 the highest
calorie
Use synonyms
 intake
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 in
Brazil
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
any
Correct determiner usage
none
show examples
 of the
countries
Use synonyms
 had
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 less than 2.500 proportion. First of all, in
2000
Punctuation problem
2000,
show examples
 the first two
countries
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 are China and
Use synonyms
Brazil
Punctuation problem
Brazil,
show examples
 had the biggest
calorie
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
consumption
Punctuation problem
consumption,
show examples
that reached
Wrong verb form
reaching
show examples
 3000.
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in Nigeria the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
calorie
Check wording
calories
show examples
 that people took was nearly 2.600. But, for the rest of the
Use synonyms
countries
Punctuation problem
countries,
show examples
 they only
reachead
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 no more than 2.500 of
calorie
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in
1975
Punctuation problem
1975,
show examples
 the highest
calorie
Use synonyms
 intake was in
Use synonyms
Brazil
Punctuation problem
Brazil,
show examples
 that shows 2.500.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in Pakistan and Nigeria
there
Punctuation problem
, there
show examples
we a
Verb problem
were
show examples
 slight differences where they
reach 2.100
Wrong verb form
reached 2,100
show examples
 and 2.200 of
calorie
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, for the rest of the
Use synonyms
countries
Punctuation problem
countries,
show examples
 they had a similar
amount
Use synonyms
 of
calorie
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
no
Verb problem
was no
show examples
 more than 2.100. In conclusion,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the bar chart shows that the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
calorie
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 peaked in 2000 in
every
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
seven
countries
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 in 1975, the highest
comsuption
Correct your spelling
consumption
 only took place in
Brazil
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words calorie, countries, amount, consumption, brazil with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 3 times.
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