IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain.The table shows where the money came from and charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparison where relevant.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
The table above illustrates the information about the police allocation in 2017 and 2018.
In addition
Linking Words
, the pie chart
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
 how the budget is distributed. It is justified that most of the finances came from the national government
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 most of it was given as salaries to the officers and staff.
Overall
Linking Words
,
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
 government was the main source of most of the police funds in
2017
Punctuation problem
2017,
show examples
 with 175.5
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
 and in
2018
Punctuation problem
2018,
show examples
 with 177.8
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, local taxis were the second highest source of the finances and made
slight
Correct article usage
a slight
show examples
 increase from 91.2
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
 to 102.3
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
 in 2018.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the pie chart
salaries
Punctuation problem
, salaries
show examples
 were the highest amounts paid in 2017 by 75% and in 2018 by 69%. The cost spent on buildings and transport did not see a
change
Punctuation problem
change,
show examples
 it
remain
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
 the same by 17% in both years.
However
Linking Words
, the proportion
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 technology increased by 6% in a year.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words million, euros with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: