IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Social media enable people to keep in touch with each other and learn about the news. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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Social media allows individuals to maintain
connected
Replace the word
connections
 with each other and acquire information about nearly everything
that is
Linking Words
 going on. It can surely bring numerous benefits and drawbacks.
This
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 essay will
be discussing
Wrong verb form
discuss
show examples
 whether the positive outcomes
surpasses
Correct subject-verb agreement
surpass
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 the negative ones. One of the major rewards of social media is being connected at
anytime
Correct your spelling
any time
 and
everywhere
Change preposition
from anywhere
show examples
 with people whose location is different
than
Change preposition
from
show examples
 ours.
Moreover
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, it makes
possible
Correct pronoun usage
it possible
show examples
 to absorb content regarding various aspects in real-time.
For instance
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, you are capacitated to have data related to sports, culture, nature, all
in a distance of
Change preposition
within
show examples
 a click and through a digital screen.
Furthermore
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, it
also
Linking Words
 facilitates the routine, optimising time and interactions with communities.
On the other hand
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, the use of these platforms can bring some detrimental impacts. Some of them are widely known,
although
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 nothing has been done to mitigate the destructive impacts generated by
it
Fix the agreement mistake
them
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. Lack of in-person interactions can lead
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a scenario of isolation, which has the potential to end up causing depression and other forms of mental health issues. In
addiction
Check wording
addition
show examples
, misinformation is another problem to deal with. It affects
communities
Check wording
communities'
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 beliefs and fosters unreal events and expectations.
To sum up
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, social media plays a vital role in our lifestyle, because it facilitates
search
Correct article usage
the search
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 process for data and connection with people.
However
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, it can potentially become a threat
in the case of
Correct word choice
if
show examples
 not
being
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
used responsibly.

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task response
For task response, give a clearer answer all the way through. You say both good and bad points, but your own view is not fully strong until the end.
task response
For task response, add one more clear example. The sports and culture part is useful, but a more real and direct example would help more.
task response
For task response, explain why the good points are stronger than the bad points, or why not. This will make your main idea easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear start, middle, and end, which is good. To improve more, make each body paragraph begin with one very clear main idea sentence.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some linking is good, like 'On the other hand' and 'To sum up'. Try to use simple clear links and avoid long unclear parts.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, develop each point a bit more. Some ideas are good, but they need one more sentence of support to feel complete.
task response
For task response, you answer the topic and talk about both advantages and disadvantages.
task response
For task response, your ideas are relevant to social media, such as staying in touch, getting news, isolation, and false information.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, the essay is well organised into introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use paragraphing and some linking words to guide the reader.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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