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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

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The chart illustrates the main reasons for
study
Use synonyms
 among students and the amount of support they received from employers, broken down by
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
study
Use synonyms
 for a career is highest
in
Change preposition
among those
show examples
 under 26 and steadily decreases as
people
Use synonyms
 get older.
In addition
Linking Words
, Employer support is
also
Linking Words
 highest
in
Change preposition
among those
show examples
 under 26 and gradually declines until 30-39 and after 40 years old, it increases again. There are two main reasons for studying
,
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
 one is for a career , and the other is for interest. The
rate
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
study
Use synonyms
 for a career is highest in the
age
Use synonyms
 under 26, with a
rate
Use synonyms
 of approximately 80% and gradually decreases as
people
Use synonyms
 get older, with the percentage of
Use synonyms
age
Check wording
people aged
show examples
 over 49 being only 19%. Meanwhile, the ratio of
people
Use synonyms
 who
study
Use synonyms
 for their interest is lowest in the
age
Use synonyms
 under 26 by 10% , and it steadily considerably rose and it took 70% when they are over 49 years old. Employer support, by
age
Use synonyms
 group , gradually decreased until the
age
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 of 39 , and the
rate
Use synonyms
 slightly increased from the
age
Use synonyms
 of 39 to over 49. Under 26 recorded the highest
rate
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 by about 64%,
while
Linking Words
 the
age
Use synonyms
 group 30-39 rated the lowest percentage by approximately 33%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words study, age, rate, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lifelong learning
  • Professional development
  • Adult education
  • Career advancement
  • Personal enrichment
  • Academic pursuits
  • Upskilling
  • Reskilling
  • Educational attainment
  • Tuition reimbursement
  • Flexible work arrangements
  • Work-study balance
  • Financial assistance
  • Professional growth
  • Study leave
  • Employee retention
  • Workforce development
  • Time management
  • Self-improvement
  • Motivational factors
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