IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

An increasing number of people are buying whta they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online?

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Nowadays, a significant number of people have started purchasing stuff that they need through online sites ,
this
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 comes with advantages and
disadvantages
Use synonyms
 ,
however
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 i believe that the advantages
outweight
Use the right word
outweigh
show examples
 the
disadvantages
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, people might argue that online shopping is a burden,
for instance
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, they think it is a big process since you have to fill out information
such
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 as
delivery
Use synonyms
 address and credit card
informations
Check wording
information
show examples
,
moreover
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, they argue that it would be highly costly since you are paying for
delivery
Use synonyms
 services and taxes,
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furthermore
Add a comma
furthermore,
show examples
 they
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that most of the sizes are
inacurate
Correct your spelling
inaccurate
.
On the other hand
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, people believe that it would be helpful for both individuals and
companies
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, and I highly agree with them. Online shopping could be extremely helpful for individuals who are busy most of the
times
Check wording
time
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 It makes the process of buying easier for them without the need to go shopping.
Companies
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 have
also
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 developed size charts for customers, which is way easier than trying on stuff. Online shopping is very beneficial for
companies
Use synonyms
 as they
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 easily advertise new products
,
Punctuation problem
;
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as a result
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, new customers will buy.
Furthermore
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, it would significantly increase a
Use synonyms
companies
Check wording
company's
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 gross market and revenue;
however
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, they might face a disadvantage , which is
delay
Correct article usage
a delay
show examples
 in orders , some
delivery
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 services take up to 7 days
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
isnt
Correct your spelling
isn't
 ideal for most customers.
Nevertheless
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,
this
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 issue could easily be fixed with fast
delivery
Use synonyms
 services.
in
Fix capitalization
In
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conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 online shopping would bring so much to the table, especially for busy workers.
however
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 it can come with some
disadvantages
Use synonyms
,
for instance
Linking Words
, delay on
delivery
Use synonyms
 and wrong sizes
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
Linking Words
nevertheless
Add a comma
nevertheless,
show examples
 the advantages
outweight
Replace the word
outweigh
 the
disadvantages
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Answer all parts of the task more fully. You wrote about people and companies, but the bad points for companies need more detail.
task response
Make your main ideas clearer. Some points are there, but they are not always well explained.
task response
Use more clear and real examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Put your ideas in a more clear order. Some long sentences make your meaning hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use full stops and link words more carefully. Too many commas join many ideas in one sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Start each main point clearly, then explain it, then give an example.
task response
You answered the main topic and gave both good and bad points about online shopping.
task response
Your opinion is clear: you think the good points are stronger than the bad points.
coherence and cohesion
You wrote an introduction and a conclusion, which helps the essay feel complete.
coherence and cohesion
You used basic link words like on the one hand, on the other hand, furthermore, and nevertheless.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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