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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods (wheat, maize, rice) by people in four different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The table illustrates information about
Use synonyms
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
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 of three basic foods by people in
Cambodia
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,
Poland
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,
Egypt
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, and
Mexico
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.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the four countries exhibited different trends over the given foods,
Cambodia
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 accounted the rice the highest number of
consumption
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,some,
such
Linking Words
 as
Egypt
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 and
Poland
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 resistered the wheat the most consuming food. As the table shows, from the four
countries
Punctuation problem
countries,
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 the highest and lowest intake of rice
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 was
higher
Correct word choice
apply
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in
Combodia
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
 and
Egypt
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at
Punctuation problem
, at
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 around 1445 and
at
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apply
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501
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
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, was
lower
Correct word choice
apply
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in
Mexico
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 and
Poland
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at
Punctuation problem
, at
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 just 57 and 19.
While
Linking Words
,
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apply
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 the
consumption
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 of wheat
most
Verb problem
is most
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commen
Correct your spelling
common
 in
Poland
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 and
Egypt
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 at 1095 and 1095, less
use
Replace the word
used
 in
Cambodia
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 and
Mexico
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 at around 18 and 275.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the
consumption
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 of maize in
Mexico
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 and
Egypt
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 recorded the highest intake, which was at around 1083 and
at
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apply
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578 , the
less
Replace the word
least
 use of maize countries
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Cambodia
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 and
Poland
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at
Punctuation problem
, at
show examples
 103 and no intake.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, cambodia, poland, egypt, mexico with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • basic foods
  • staples
  • dietary preferences
  • agricultural output
  • nutritional intake
  • per capita
  • predominant
  • subsistence crops
  • culinary habits
  • food security
  • statistical overview
  • consumption patterns
  • comparative analysis
  • domestic production
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