Some people say international sports events help in world peace. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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There is no denying the fact that sports competitions
are
Verb problem
apply
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make
people
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fling
Wrong verb form
feel
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happiness.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that good for
world
Correct article usage
the world
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over the long term, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that international sports
events
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have a lot of benefits.
To begin
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with, sporting
events
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can bring good financial benefits to countries.
In other words
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, it is give they
people
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jobs.
In addition
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, that can create ob opportunities and help
people
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express their skills. Another point to consider, global sporting
events
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help spread cultures and introduce
people
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to different traditions. It is
also
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possible to say that
people
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can learn about local traditions.
For instance
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, other communities learn about food and language when they visit the host country. In conclusion, despite
people
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having different views, I believe that international sporting
events
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improve the world in many ways, which is good for everyone.

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task response
Answer the main question more clearly. Say if you agree, disagree, or partly agree, and keep this clear in all parts.
task response
Give more support for each main point. Add one clear reason and one simple example in each body part.
task response
Use ideas about world peace, not only money and culture. Link each point back to peace between countries.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph have one main idea. Start with a clear topic sentence, then explain it.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words well, like First, Also, For example, and In conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order and grammar so your meaning is easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has basic paragraphing, and your ideas are in a simple order.
task response
You give two main ideas: money/jobs and culture/traditions.
task response
You use one example about visitors learning food and language.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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