Advertising brings many benefits to the economy, but it also makes people dissatisfied with what ghey already have. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is undeniable that advertisements play an increasingly vital role in
this
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digital world and contemporary economies.
While
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some believe that they bring various economic advantages, others argue that they make people discontented with what they already have. Personally, I gravitate toward the former viewpoint.
This
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essay aims to provide a comprehensive analysis
both
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of both
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views and offer my own perspective. Examining the former viewpoint, it is true that advertising helps enterprises attract customers and increase sales through their widely publicised image. Eye-catching images and videos, or concise messages, are key elements that enhance their product's public image, thereby attracting a wider range of customers. To illustrate, many large companies worldwide,
such
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as McDonald's or Burger King, have opened numerous branches in countries around the world, thanks to their unique advertising campaigns.
Furthermore
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, ads serve as a great way to reinforce firms' products.
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is
due to
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the fact that they are forced to enhance their goods, prices and services in order to stand out in the market.
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competition can ultimately benefit consumers through better quality and greater choice.
Conversely
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, the counter-argument emphasises the drawbacks of advertising as it negatively
affect
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affects
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residents' attitudes and
behaviors
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behaviours
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.
Although
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advertisements have various positive values, they still create dissatisfaction with existing possessions. As ads present idealised lifestyles, luxury products and unrealistic standards or success, they cause individuals to feel inadequate or unhappy with what they
are
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apply
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already own.
Moreover
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, advertising encourages excessive consumerism, where people purchase products not because they truly need them, but because they are influenced by persuasive marketing campaigns or social pressure.
Therefore
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,
this
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lead
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led
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to financial stress and unnecessary waste. From my point of view, despite the fact that advertisements encourage
materialism
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a materialistic
attitude in some cases, consumers still have the ability to make rational choices about their spending habits. What is more, the economic advantages generated by advertising
,
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are
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particularly
in
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significant in
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terms of business growth and employment. In conclusion,
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advertising undoubtedly stimulates economic growth by driving consumer spending and funding media industries, its psychological toll in fueling endless materialism cannot be ignored. Personally, I believe that advertising does more good than harm to society, provided that consumers maintain a critical mindset and make conscious purchasing decisions.

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task response
Write the task words in a more exact way in the first paragraph. Say 'This essay will discuss both views and give my opinion.'
task response
Give a fuller reason for your opinion in the last body paragraph. Now it is a bit short and one idea is not fully finished.
task response
Use one more clear and real example for the side effects of ads. This will make your ideas stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph on one main idea, and link the last body paragraph more clearly to your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Check linking words and grammar in them, for example 'this lead' should be 'this leads'. Small errors can make the flow less smooth.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are too long. Split them into two shorter ones so the meaning is easier to follow.
task response
You answered all parts of the task: both views are discussed and your opinion is clear.
task response
Your main ideas are mostly clear and easy to understand.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words like 'Furthermore', 'Conversely', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader.
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