Today many children are overweight. This is a serious health issue. Give the reasons for this and give some solutions to solve this problem.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Start now →

Introduction

Nowadays, there are many

children

Use synonyms

who are overweight. Even

the

Correct word choice

though the

show examples

world is very different

and

Correct word choice

show examples

it is easy for them to keep healthy. There are many reasons for that issue.

This

Linking Words

essay will focus primarily on the reasons

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

why

children

Use synonyms

are overweight and some solutions to keep their

weight

Use synonyms

down or normal

weight

Use synonyms

Body · 1

On one hand, many reasons are observed in daily life that keep

them

Correct pronoun usage

people

show examples

unhealthy and obese. First reason is that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

life is going on so fast in every single thing

especially

Punctuation problem

, especially

show examples

in the diet.

Alot

Correct your spelling

A lot

of families depend on restaurants and fast

foods

Check wording

food

show examples

due to

Linking Words

their job nature.

For instance

Linking Words

, a family

that

Correct pronoun usage

where

show examples

both parents are working at the same time. They

have not

Correct word order

do not have

show examples

enough time to make a healthy meal for their

children

Use synonyms

As a

Linking Words

result

Add a comma

result,

show examples

they will choose the easiest way

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

order

Verb problem

to order

show examples

from a restaurant.

Second

Correct article usage

The second

show examples

reason is that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

some

children

Use synonyms

are not going to the gym because of their school time or playing

with

Change preposition

show examples

their computers

Body · 2

Body · 3

However

Linking Words

on the other

Linking Words

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

there are many solutions that can help them get a healthy

weight

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, follow a strict diet plan

that is

Linking Words

designed for losing

weight

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, going to the gym at least twice a week.

Lastly

Linking Words

, prevent any kind of unhealthy snacks

such

Linking Words

as chocolate, chips and candy.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it is clear to see that overweight

children

Use synonyms

are having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

a hard problem that leads to many harmful diseases.

However

Linking Words

, it must be said that there are many solutions that can help prevent

that

Fix the agreement mistake

those

show examples

diseases.

alfred

May 24, 2026

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Answer both parts more fully. You give reasons and solutions, but each part needs more detail.

coherence and cohesion

Use clearer main ideas in each body paragraph. One paragraph for reasons and one for solutions is good, but explain each point more.

task response

Give a more specific example. Your example about working parents is relevant, but it can be clearer and shorter.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words in a smooth way. Words like first, second, however, and as a result are useful, but some sentences still feel disconnected.

coherence and cohesion

Check paragraph unity. The point about computers is not fully explained, so it feels unfinished.

task response

Make your conclusion match your ideas. Write the main reasons and solutions again in a short clear way.

task response

You answer both parts of the question: reasons and solutions.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

You use some clear linking words such as first, secondly, however, and in conclusion.

task response

The example about busy parents and restaurant food is relevant to the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

254 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Many children would spend a big portion of their day on their smartphones. This is because smartphones offer easy access to different types of entertainment without any supervision, while also providing children with new ways of learning through various educational platforms. My stance regarding this notion is this phenomenon can be considered positive progress, as long as children using smartphones receive proper moderation by their guardians.
6.5
band
Some people think that students should only study with those who are at the same level of intelligence. However, others argue that it is better for students to study in an environment of mixed abilities. Discuss both views and give your opinion
While it is commonly thought that it is better to arrange smart scholars to learn only with each other , others believe an environment with pupils at mixed levels of intelligence is actually better. I’m going to discuss these opposing points of view. In my opinion, the mixed environment is better for improving the majority of students.
6
band
You are looking for a full-time job, and recently you saw a job opening in am advertisement Write a letter to the company. In your letter: • introduce yourself • explain what sort of job you would like to do • and say what experience and skills you have You should write at least 150 words
I am writing to apply for the programmer in your company called "Microsoft". My full name is Eshmamatova Lola Bekzodovna and I was born on 11th June 2000th year. The Microsoft company, that you have advertised in a local newspaper recently.
6
band
Some think college is best for career preparation, while others prefer gaining work experience early. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some believe that higher education is the key/optimal for professional preparation, while others preferably think that exposure to job understanding early is better. In my opinion, I believe that having higher education is essential for academic success, while task judgment could gain soft skills.
6.5
band
The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
These days, the amount of fast food and certain supermarket products eaten in social life is growing. While some people argue that this trend will influence children’s nutrition, others claim that it has no damaging effect on them. I believe that in most cases this type of food affects people's digestion, especially children.

Today many children are overweight. This is a serious health issue. Give the reasons for this and give some solutions to solve this problem.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that students should only study with those who are at the same level of intelligence. However, others argue that it is better for students to study in an environment of mixed abilities. Discuss both views and give your opinion

You are looking for a full-time job, and recently you saw a job opening in am advertisement Write a letter to the company. In your letter: • introduce yourself • explain what sort of job you would like to do • and say what experience and skills you have You should write at least 150 words

Some think college is best for career preparation, while others prefer gaining work experience early. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?