IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

some people believe that the use of books has passed, while other believe there is still hope. disciuss both views and give your opinion

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Start now →
Introduction
There is a debate
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that
trend
Correct article usage
the trend
show examples
 of reading
books
Use synonyms
 is no more.
However
Linking Words
, some people
recon
Correct your spelling
reckon
 that
books
Use synonyms
 are still read by many people.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
both points of views and
then
Linking Words
 it will provide the solutions.
Conclusion
There is no doubt about the fact that, in the past
Use synonyms
books
Punctuation problem
, books
show examples
 were the main source of knowledge and education. Modern learning is replacing
books
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
still
Correct word order
books are still
show examples
books
Use synonyms
 are famous among many people. Learning through printing pages is
easier
Correct article usage
an easier
show examples
 and
clear
Replace the word
clearer
 way to read. On the other
side
Check wording
hand
show examples
, reading on screen is not good for eyesight
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it's hard to fully concentrate. Most individuals love to go to the
libraries
Check wording
library
show examples
 and read
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
books
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 which they are interested in. Personally, I don't like online reading
rather
Punctuation problem
; rather
show examples
, I prefer reading
books
Use synonyms
, because in
Linking Words
this
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 way I can pay more attention to what I am reading.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Write about both sides in a fair way. Now you mostly support books, but you do not explain well why some people think books have passed.
task response
Give your opinion clearly in the end and make sure it answers the full question.
task response
Add one or two clear examples to support your main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple plan: introduction, one body paragraph for view 1, one body paragraph for view 2, then conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more clearly with words like first, however, for example, and in conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph stay on one main idea. This will make your writing easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear topic at the start.
task response
You give your own opinion about reading books.
coherence and cohesion
Some linking words are used, such as however and on the other side.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: