There is no doubt that globalisation has benefited the world by bringing together people, business and nations. People who criticise it stand in the way of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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Introduction

Globalisation has brought many benefits to the modern world.

Although

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apply

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there are those who wish to stop its advancement.

This

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essay will first discuss

with

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apply

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those in agreement before turning to the other side. In my personal view,

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fully stand with those who say that the

modernazation

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modernisation

of the human world has brought many advantages, but it does have a couple of downsides to it.

Body · 1

One

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of the

benifits

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benefits

is that everyone from all parts of the world can experience the diversity of cultures, and

its

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their

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similarities.

This

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due to

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the fact that many immigrants usually bring their culture with them, allowing many residents and tourists in major cities to experience it.

One

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clear example of

this

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happening is the

city

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of New

york

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York

show examples

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that

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which

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is synonymous with its diversity of ethnicities. With both tourists and businesses wanting to fund

this

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city

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. that

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, which

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has majorly benefitted its economic value as a

city

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and its nation.

Body · 2

On the other hand

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one

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of the many

critisims

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criticisms

that globalisation has

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apply

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is that most cultures can get

dilueted

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diluted

and

ereased

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erased

, and

that is

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a problem many cities

recieve

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face

This

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is because when people migrate to another

nation

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nation,

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they might not want to

assimulate

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assimilate

with its culture,

thus

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leading to its death.

For instance

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, many residents of the

city

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of London complain that

their

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there

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is a lack of endorement to their

orignal

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original

culture.

Therefore

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, that was

one

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of the reasons that stopped its advancement in the first place.

Conclusion

In conclusion, globalisation has

benifited

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benefited

the general human populace, but it does have its disadvantages. And most of the

benifits

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benefits

far outweigh the downsides in my opinion.

abdullahalmiskeen

May 27, 2026

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task response

Give a more clear answer to the question from the start. Say if you agree, disagree, or partly agree.

task response

Develop each main idea more. Explain how and why globalisation helps or harms people.

task response

Use examples that are more clear and more direct. Show how each example supports your point.

coherence and cohesion

Make your ideas easier to follow. Some parts jump too fast from one point to another.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words in a more natural way, such as 'first', 'however', 'for example', and 'therefore'.

coherence and cohesion

Check sentence connection. A few sentences do not link well and this makes the essay less smooth.

task response

You answer both sides of the topic and give your own opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

task response

You use examples about New York and London to support your ideas.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

international trade
cultural homogenization
multinational corporations
sustainable development
economic disparities
technological advancement
cultural exchange
scrutinize
ethics
innovation
connectivity
protectionism
outsourcing
free market
trade liberalization

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