IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

you work for an international company, and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter explain why you want to work in the company's head office for six months say how your work could be done while you are away ask for his/her help in arranging it

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Dear
sir
Fix capitalization
Sir
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, It is stated that I
am
Wrong verb form
have been
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 working as a resident surgeon in the hospital for 2 years. Yesterday, I saw a poster on
hospital's
Correct article usage
the hospital's
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 notice board about a new "Doctor Exchange Programme", which really intrigued me.
This
Linking Words
 new initiative is taking doctors from peripheral branches of hospitals and training them in the
head
Use the right word
main
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 hospital in the United States of America for six months. There,I will be able to learn new advancements in
surgical
Correct article usage
the surgical
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 field with robotics and cutting-edge technology. The participation has associated privileges of performing modern surgeries
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 will help me become a better doctor. The other doctor who is being exchanged with me
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 will be performing all my duties and shifts. I have been a sincere and hardworking trainee
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I really deserve
this
Linking Words
 opportunity. I
wll
Correct your spelling
will
 bring all my
kmowledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 and new skills back to our department and share
thhem
Correct your spelling
them
 with my colleagues.I cannot meet the expenses to travel, so I will be very thankful to you if you could do the arrangements for my travel and accommodation. Yours sincerely, Dr Hasher Islam.

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task response
Task response: You answer all parts, but add a little more detail about why you want to go and how your work will be covered.
task response
Task response: Use a more polite request at the end, for example ask for support and say why it will help the hospital.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your ideas are clear, but some parts need better linking words like also, because, and so.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Keep one main idea in each paragraph to make the letter easier to follow.
task response
Task response: You cover the three main points from the question.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: The letter has a clear opening, body, and ending.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: The closing is suitable for a formal letter.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professional advancement
  • cross-cultural collaboration
  • headquarters/ head office
  • global perspective
  • remote work
  • temporary assignment
  • team dynamics
  • networking opportunities
  • cultural immersion
  • succession planning
  • collaborative tools
  • time zone coordination
  • corporate hierarchy
  • relocation logistics
  • work-life balance
  • multinational environment
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