IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the donation given to six different types of charity by one company from 2012 to 2014 (in millions). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The given bar chart delineates the
donation
Check wording
donations
show examples
 given to six different types of
charity
Use synonyms
 by a company from 2012-2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is conspicuous that
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
charity
Use synonyms
 in 2014 was the highest expenditure for
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
 compared to
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 years before. What is most striking when looking at the data is the fact that the biggest
charity
Use synonyms
 was in social
wellfare
Correct your spelling
welfare
. In
almost
Correct article usage
an almost
show examples
3 years
Correct word choice
3-year
show examples
 period, the amount of money spend in Social wellfare reach almost 25
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 at the highest in 2014 and almost 20
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 at the lowest in 2013.
While
Linking Words
 the lowest spend over the period was on Arts
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 on average
less
Verb problem
was less
show examples
 than 5
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 other
expenditure
Fix the agreement mistake
expenditures
show examples
 were
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
,
Health
Correct article usage
the Health
show examples
 and Wildlife
charity
Use synonyms
was incrase
Verb problem
increased
show examples
 during the period. The biggest fall
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
charity
Use synonyms
 was in Social
wellfare
Correct your spelling
Welfare
 in
2013
Punctuation problem
2013,
show examples
 compared to 2012
was
Correct pronoun usage
, which was
show examples
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
over
Change preposition
of over
show examples
 10
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 the biggest increase
Linking Words
also
Verb problem
was also
show examples
 from the same field
increased
Correct pronoun usage
, which increased
show examples
almost
Change preposition
by almost
show examples
 12
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 in the next year. The slightest increase happened on arts
charity
Use synonyms
 with only 2
thousand
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 from 2013 to 2014.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words charity, thousand, dollars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • donation, charity, company, million, rise, fall, increase, decrease, highest, lowest, overall, compared with, while, from, to, over the period
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