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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

as people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some opine that the human ability to think for themselves will deteriorate as the dependence on technology increases. I agree with that statement. One reason for
this
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 is artificial intelligence. With the introduction of
this
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, people have been relying on it for every task and problem, even the simple ones.
For example
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, using AI to generate and make things like writing an email or responding to messages. In the long term, the ability to accomplish quick tasks like
this
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 will take longer than it actually takes without
this
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 tool. Another example of
this
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 is
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 students utilising the tool in an immoral way. They ask ChatGPT for answers to their homework. They resulted in them not actually understanding the concept of the topic.
For instance
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, there have been several school situations
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where children ace their assignments ;
however
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, when it comes to their graded tests and exams, their scores are significantly lower. Research has shown
,
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that
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 using technology reduces human skills
such
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 as creativity ,innovation and problem solving. Scrolling all day on reels gives you fake dopamine. It reduces the attention span ;
therefore
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,
this
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 tech can give you a response within seconds.
This
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 is a convenience so people do so often as they have no patience to do it themselves ,and it requires less
efforts
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effort
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. From my perspective, I agree with the statement as I have experienced it myself. At
moments
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times
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, I would spend asking Gemini for ideas so often that when time came around, I could not generate ideas from the top of my head like I used to.
Therefore
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, being dependent on technology can result in a depreciation in human skills.

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task response
Give a more clear answer to the question all through the essay, not only in the first and last line.
task response
Explain your main ideas more deeply. Some points are good, but they need more detail to fully show why you agree.
task response
Use examples that are more exact and clear. This will make your ideas stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Group ideas in a more even way. One paragraph talks about AI, another about students, and another about social media, but the link between them can be smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a more natural way. Some words like 'therefore' and 'for instance' are used, but sometimes the flow still feels sudden.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence connection and punctuation, because a few parts break the flow and make the meaning less clear.
task response
You answer the question and clearly show that you agree.
task response
You give more than one reason, which helps support your view.
coherence and cohesion
There is a clear beginning, body, and ending.
coherence and cohesion
Most paragraphs stay on one main idea.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Over-reliance
  • Cognitive capabilities
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Diminish
  • Augment
  • Natural sense of direction
  • Access to information
  • Cognitive development
  • Education reforms
  • Technological advancement
  • Nuanced position
  • Recapitulate
  • Affirm
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