IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

30.Environmental problems such as pollution and climate change affect all the people in the world. Although global decisions are made to reduce these problems, the solutions are not effective. Why are the solutions ineffective? How can these problems be solved? Write an essay with no less than 250 words.

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It is true that environmental problems have significantly influenced the world.
Although
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 some global
agreements
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 are made to alleviate the situation, the results are less likely to be effective.
This
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 essay will dive into the issue in a comprehensive manner before discussing possible solutions.
Initially
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, one of the main arguments for the reasons leading to ineffectiveness of these global decisions is that the
agreements
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 are not implemented thoroughly. Some of the
agreements
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 may be abandoned when they challenge economic growth or technology development.
For example
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, some factories may discharge wastewater illegally for their convenience and cost savings.
As a result
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, water pollution becomes worse.
Therefore
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, global
agreements
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 are challenged by personal benefits. To effectively solve these problems, global decisions require strict policies to ensure accurate implementations.
Hence
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, a detailed standard should be recorded, and regular inspections must be implemented accurately.
Moreover
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, collaboration between companies and governments will create a balance between environmental protection and business growth. In conclusion, environmental issues heavily rely on the coordination between governments and the private sector. It is indispensable that the global
agreements
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 are fully understood and conducted for creating a sustainable environment.

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task response
Answer both questions more fully. You explain why plans do not work, but you give only one main reason. Add one more reason and explain it.
task response
Your solutions are good, but they are too short. Say how each solution can work in real life.
task response
Use a more clear example. The factory example is relevant, but it is small and not fully developed.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end. Keep this shape.
coherence and cohesion
Link your ideas more smoothly. Some parts move too fast from problem to solution.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point with one extra sentence of support or result.
task response
You clearly introduce the topic and give your main plan in the first paragraph.
task response
You answer both parts of the question, so your essay stays on topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow because each paragraph has one main idea.
coherence and cohesion
You have both an introduction and a conclusion, which helps the whole essay feel complete.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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