Some people believe that the experiences children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future life. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your option

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There is no denying the fact that the
experiences
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children have before school will have the greatest effect on their future
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life
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lives
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.
However
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, others believe that
experiences
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gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence.
This
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essay will analyse
this
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topic from
both
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points
and
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of view and
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express my opinion. On the one hand, a lot of
people
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see that the greatest effect is when they are children.
In other words
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, before the mind is fully developed,
experiences
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in childhood can change how
people
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think and what they choose.
For example
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, if a child brushes his teeth every day, he will grow up with
this
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good habit.
Also
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, if a child has good
experiences
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in childhood,
he
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they
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will become a better person. They
also
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learn how to talk with other
people
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and how to solve simple problems. These skills can help them in school and later in
life
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.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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argue that teenage
experiences
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have a bigger influence.
In other words
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, school and friendships have the greatest effect on their minds and personalities.
For example
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, if a teenage boy has good friends, he will be like them, and they will affect him in a good way. In my opinion, I think that
both
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points are right and
both
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are important to their future
life
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and help each other, and no one has a bigger influence. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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topic.
For
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this
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reason,
both
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stages are very important in a person’s
life
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.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. The teen side is too short.
task response
Give your opinion more clearly and support it with one reason.
task response
Add more clear ideas, not only general points.
task response
Use one more real or clear example for each side.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly. Some parts repeat the same idea.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point more. Some points stop too fast.
task response
You discuss both views, so you follow the question.
task response
Your opinion is present in the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it has clear paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
You use simple linkers like On the one hand, On the other hand, and In conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • experiences
  • influence
  • future
  • development
  • childhood
  • teenagers
  • independence
  • emotional
  • skills
  • relationships
  • decisions
  • identity
  • growth
  • interactions
  • foundation
  • pathway
  • importance
  • education
  • social
  • complex
  • part-time jobs
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