IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

More and more people nowadays visit well-known places to take photographs of themselves, without looking at the place. Why do you think this is happening? Is it a positive or a negative trend? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Introduction
Photography is actually be come trend.
Now a day
Correct your spelling
Nowadays
Linking Words
due
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
 to
impact
Correct article usage
the impact
show examples
 of Social
Media
Use synonyms
 People are not looking at the place they visit but rather concentrate on taking photographs of the place
thinking
Punctuation problem
, thinking
show examples
 that they will post them on
facebook
Capitalize the proper name
Facebook
show examples
 or
instagram
Capitalize the proper name
Instagram
show examples
. They get a different kind of pleasure when they get more likes on their posts
in the Social
Change preposition
on social media
show examples
Media
Use synonyms
.
Body paragraph 1
These
Correct pronoun usage
There
show examples
 are many reasons behind???
the
Capitalize the word
The
show examples
 fact that people have access to
camera
Correct article usage
a camera
show examples
 and internet
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 at their fingertips
they
Punctuation problem
, they
show examples
 have forgotten the value of the nature of the place they are visiting.
Body paragraph 2
There are negative and positive impact over
this
Linking Words
 situation.
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Firstly
Punctuation problem
Firstly,
show examples
 when we look at good
things
Punctuation problem
things,
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 it is good that the Technology has given an advanced
accebility
Correct your spelling
accessibility
 to the high speed internet in our pockets and
high defination
Correct your spelling
high-definition
 cameras at a
cheapest
Correct word choice
low
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 price.
Body paragraph 3
This
Linking Words
 helps us to capture all that we need immediately.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there is no skill or learning of a certification required for that, even a kid is able to capture beautiful pictures using Mobile Phones.
Body paragraph 4
Thirdly
Linking Words
, it is giving
opportunity
Correct article usage
an opportunity
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as
Correct word choice
apply
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not to miss
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
 that we capture to share at affortable price.
Body paragraph 5
Though there are positive aspects for
this
Linking Words
 practices, as bad
also
Linking Words
 follows good, there are negative points that we need to think about as well.
Body paragraph 6
One among these is privacy, when we post some of the photographs in social
media
Use synonyms
,
Every one
Correct your spelling
everyone
 will get to know
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
what is happening
our
Change preposition
in our
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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. The privacy is
effected
Use the right word
affected
show examples
.
Body paragraph 7
Linking Words
Secondly
Add a comma
Secondly,
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 it is giving an opportunity for
fradster’s
Correct your spelling
fraudsters
 to collect information like our address, Date of birth Age and so forth that they can get access to the Banking information and Scam and Rob the Money.
Conclusion
To conclude
Linking Words
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 positive things only give satification but the negative
once
Use the right word
ones
show examples
 are the real threats to personal information and individuals life.

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task response
Answer both questions more clearly: why this happens, and if it is good or bad.
task response
Give one clear view. You say both good and bad, but your end says it is bad. Make this clear from the start.
coherence and cohesion
Use more clear main ideas in each part. One part for reasons, one part for good or bad points.
task response
Add simple examples to support your ideas. This will make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with easy words like first, also, however, and in the end.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each sentence short and clear so the reader can follow your meaning.
task response
You answer the topic and talk about social media, which is a key reason.
task response
You include both good and bad sides, so you try to look at the topic in a full way.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an opening and an ending.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Visual content
  • Landmarks
  • Likes and followers
  • Selfie
  • Trophy
  • Validation
  • Accomplishment
  • Technological advancements
  • Smartphone cameras
  • Photography-focused tourism
  • Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
  • Immersing
  • Local economy
  • Cultural significance
  • Backdrops
  • Photographic evidence
  • Overcrowding
  • Wear and tear
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