IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of university graduates in Canada from 1992 to 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The line graph illustrates the number of male and
females
Correct word choice
female
show examples
 graduates in Canada between 1992
to
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
females
Correct word choice
female
show examples
 figures is significant above regarding males statistic. The female percentage is starting and overtaking on the figure where the male percentage reached. It is clear on the depicted graph that
women
Check wording
the number of women
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noticeable
Replace the word
noticeably
 increased from 100,000 to 150,000
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is 50,000 total of graduates during 1992-2007.
Firstly
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
, from
show examples
 1992 to
1994
Punctuation problem
1994,
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 figures slightly shifted up
than
Correct word choice
, then
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 remained stable till 2000
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 drastically increased to the peak from 2000 to 2006. Turning to
Correct article usage
the men
show examples
men
Check wording
men's
show examples
 line
it
Punctuation problem
, it
show examples
 can be seen that
line
Correct article usage
the line
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 marginally climbed from 70,000 to almost 80,000 between 1992
to
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 1998
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 rose gradually to 100,000 in 2006
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is only 40,000 total
graduated male
Replace the word
graduates
.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • general trend
  • fluctuations
  • peaks
  • dips
  • significant differences
  • increase/decrease
  • comparison
  • data
  • period
  • economic conditions
  • policy changes
  • cultural shifts
  • implications
  • workforce
  • economy
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