IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

When designing a building the most important factor is the intended use of the building rather than its outward appearance. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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One of the main factors when designing the building is the purpose of using construction inward
than
Correct word choice
rather than
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 external view. It seems to me that at the beginning of the project for building it is needed to pay attention
for
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 inner functionality
than
Correct word choice
rather than
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outward
Correct article usage
the outward
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 appearance. The main obstacle would appear to be the number of people who think that when designing a building inner functionality is a matter of great importance.
For example
Linking Words
, when you moved to a new
house
Use synonyms
first
Punctuation problem
, first
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 you considered functionality and comfortability into the
house
Use synonyms
at
Punctuation problem
; at
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this
Linking Words
 moment
you
Punctuation problem
, you
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 do not think about
external
Correct article usage
the external
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 view. If a new
house
Use synonyms
 is not suitable for
you
Punctuation problem
you,
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 there are different ideas for changing the project if it is possible. It takes a long time and effort. A
further
Linking Words
 painful issue related to your feeling that you have to do alteration in the
house
Use synonyms
has
Correct pronoun usage
that has
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 just been constructed. The feeling of dissatisfaction
of
Change preposition
with
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 the
house
Use synonyms
 remains for years. Admittedly, I partly agree with those who argue that it is needed to consider
external
Correct article usage
the external
show examples
 view
than
Correct word choice
rather than
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intended
Correct article usage
the intended
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 use when designing a building, but
this
Linking Words
 opinion suffers significantly when confronted with real use. Nobody denies that a building should have a beautiful look and
harmonization
Change the spelling
harmonisation
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 with other buildings, but
this
Linking Words
 issue should be considered after designing inward and taking into
accountant
Replace the word
account
 all factors for the purpose of
using
Replace the word
use
. I agree that primarily the process of designing a building should start with the purpose of
using
Replace the word
use
 in order to
lose time to be
Verb problem
avoid
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 changing a ready construction for suitable use.

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task response
Score: 5. You answer the question and give your own view, but your ideas are not fully clear or fully developed. Say clearly if you agree fully or partly agree. Your essay says both, so the reader may be unsure.
task response
Explain why intended use is more important. You could write about safety, comfort, space, and how people can use the building every day.
task response
Add one more clear example, such as a school, hospital, or office. Show what may go wrong if the outside look is put first.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 5. The main order is easy to see, but some sentences are hard to follow. Keep one main idea in each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links more often: “First”, “Also”, “However”, “For this reason”, and “In the end”.
coherence and cohesion
Some parts repeat the same idea about changing a house. Make this shorter, then use the space to explain your main point more.
coherence and cohesion
Make your end stronger. State your view again in one clear line: “I agree that intended use should come first, while outward look is also important.”
task response
Your view is clear: use inside the building is more important than how it looks outside.
task response
You give a useful home example to show why a building must work well for the people who use it.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an end.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as “For example” and “Admittedly” help show the link between ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • functionality
  • user experience
  • ergonomic
  • productivity
  • safety standards
  • building codes
  • emergency exits
  • ventilation
  • accessibility features
  • sustainability
  • energy-efficient
  • flexibility
  • adaptability
  • multifunctional
  • regulations
  • operational costs
  • environmental impact
What to do next:
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