In some countries, the number of people visiting art galleries is reducing. What do you think the reasons for this are? How can we solve this problem?
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Introduction
In recent years, many
art
Use synonyms
galleries
in some countries Use synonyms
are
facing a decline in the number of visitors. In Wrong verb form
have been
this
Linking Words
essay
I will discuss the reasons for Add a comma
essay,
this
problem Linking Words
and
I will present the solution for it.Punctuation problem
, and
Body paragraph 1
The most important reason is
many
Correct word choice
that many
people
believe that Use synonyms
art
Use synonyms
galleries
are designed for wealthy Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
In other words
, they think that they need to be a rich human to buy a painting, because many Linking Words
art
Use synonyms
galleries
are located in the capital cities, and some Use synonyms
galleries
Use synonyms
involve
invaluable Verb problem
exhibit
paintings
. Use synonyms
For example
, there are many Linking Words
art
Use synonyms
galleries
around the world Use synonyms
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
showed
a high Wrong verb form
shown
price
for their Use synonyms
paintings
. SoUse synonyms
that
, Correct word choice
apply
people
prefer another place to Use synonyms
art
Use synonyms
galleries
.Use synonyms
Body paragraph 2
The solution for
this
problem, Linking Words
galleries
should set a Use synonyms
price
limit for almost Use synonyms
Use synonyms
paintings
. Correct determiner usage
all paintings
In addition
, governments must put a maximum Linking Words
price
for buying process. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, Linking Words
galleries
have to present their shows Use synonyms
in
social media, and provide an offer to transport Change preposition
on
people
to their festivals, because a lot of Use synonyms
people
like to goUse synonyms
a
new place, if Change preposition
to a
this
place does not cost a lot of many. These strategies may encourage visitors to visit Linking Words
art
Use synonyms
galleries
Use synonyms
,
and attract them to buy affordable Remove the comma
apply
paintings
.Use synonyms
Conclusion
In conclusion, fewer
people
visit Use synonyms
art
Use synonyms
galleries
in some countries, because many Use synonyms
people
think that Use synonyms
art
Use synonyms
galleries
Use synonyms
for
healthy Verb problem
are for
human
. Governments and Check wording
people
are
Verb problem
apply
galleries
should be Use synonyms
to
select a maximum Correct word choice
able to
price
for Use synonyms
paintings
, and provide transportation to their shows and festivals. These approaches will increase the number Use synonyms
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
to visit
Wrong verb form
visiting
galleries
and Use synonyms
share to
solve Verb problem
help
this
problem.Linking Words
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task response
Answer both parts more fully. Give more than one clear reason for fewer visits, such as high cost, long travel, little free time, or people watching art online.
task response
Your main reason is clear, but the idea about buying paintings is not strong. People can visit many galleries without buying art. Focus on why people do not want to visit.
task response
Make each solution match a reason. For example, if travel is hard, offer free buses. If people think galleries are only for rich people, offer free days and art events for all people.
task response
Use real and clear examples. Instead of saying that galleries show high prices, describe a free weekend event, a school visit, or a bus from the city center.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clearer four-part plan: introduction, reasons, solutions, and conclusion. Keep all reasons in one part and all solutions in the next part.
coherence and cohesion
Start each main part with one clear first sentence. Then explain the idea and give one example. This will make your writing easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words used in the right way: 'because', 'for example', 'as a result', and 'therefore'. Do not use 'So that' when you mean 'therefore'.
coherence and cohesion
Make the last part shorter and clearer. Repeat your two main points in new words, without adding unclear new ideas.
task response
You answer both the reasons and solutions parts of the question.
task response
You give useful solution ideas, such as social media and help with travel.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two main parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as 'In addition', 'Furthermore', and 'For example'.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite